Smutty Surgery Articles

Better for her, worse for him?

April 7, 2014 19:19:45 Posted at April 7, 2014 19:19:45
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, KHAPGG/ STARPICZ/ Splash

Nicole Kidman is currently in Australia shooting a movie called Strangeland. This is why she couldn’t attend the ACM Awards with Keith Urban. As you can see, Gran’s gone brown. And it works for her. Because it softens her face. It mutes the enhancements. There’s something about blonde on her that highlights the tight and the fill, you know? Over in Vegas though, where Keith was winning awards and performing, it’s a different story. Full Story

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Katy Perry’s Beatles cape

January 28, 2014 20:33:28 Posted at January 28, 2014 20:33:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Kevin Winter/ Larry Busacca/ Frazer Harrison/ Getty

You know what? I like this outfit way more than her Grammys dress – the one that looked like it was fashioned from an Ikea duvet cover, click here for a refresher. This is Katy Perry at the Grammys Beatles tribute last night. It looks like she performed. Full Story

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Madonna cane and grills

January 27, 2014 15:31:25 Posted at January 27, 2014 15:31:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

The best part of Madonna’s appearance at the Grammys last night was her matching mom and son red carpet ensemble with David Banda. He’s a badass poser. Who, apparently, is waiting to get his own grill, because his mother promised him one but first they have to go to the dentist and get a mold. Full Story

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Keith Urban’s Grammy face

January 27, 2014 14:51:10 Posted at January 27, 2014 14:51:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jason Merritt/ Getty

Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman did not attend the Grammys last night. But she was there in spirit…all over her husband’s face, holy sh-t. To me it looks like he completely redesigned his bone structure – full cheeks and not a line anywhere. I guess it’s not a new thing but since he’s always with Gran, we’re too busy looking at her unnatural perfection instead of noticing that the same has been happening to him. Full Story

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Meg & John in Italy

June 21, 2013 17:35:04 Posted at June 21, 2013 17:35:04
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Jose Perez/ Splash, Valerio Pennicino/ Getty

Meg Ryan was honoured in Italy at the Taormina Film Festival. Man, I really don’t know about those shoes. I don’t understand those shoes, though I suspect you’re not looking at the shoes because you’re looking at something else. Fair enough. I don’t understand the thing you’re looking at either. Full Story

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Rob Lowe’s Dr Plastic

May 28, 2013 15:54:49 Posted at May 28, 2013 15:54:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet

Did you watch Behind The Candelabra? I’m going to keep harassing you about this. Anyway, Rob Lowe, one of Hollywood’s most well-aged faces (is this irony? I never know), played Liberace’s plastic surgeon Dr Startz. Dr Startz did a lot of rich faces back then. Lowe’s performance was hilarious if not sliiiiiightly extra. Full Story

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As IF, Granny Freeze

February 1, 2013 21:20:35 Posted at February 1, 2013 21:20:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jen Lowery/ Splash

I wrote last week that I prefer the Joan Rivers way of face-jacking which is that she does it and she doesn’t lie about it. Ashley Judd wrote a piece with big words lecturing everyone last year after the Internet went crazy about what she called, at the time, a reaction to “steroid medication” due to illness. Full Story

Granny humps for Matt Damon

January 25, 2013 20:41:18 Posted at January 25, 2013 20:41:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

Did you see Jimmy Kimmel Sucks hosted by Matt Damon last night? I was Nyquiled so I only watched this morning, in bits and pieces because the entire show is geo-blocked and YouTube has the individual segments spliced up. Heads up Americans, before you send a recommendation, Hulu is geo-blocked too. Full Story

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Blush Dresses at the Globes: Amy Adams and Megan Fox

January 14, 2013 17:32:35 Posted at January 14, 2013 17:32:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jason Merritt/ Kevin Winter/ ROBYN BECK/ Getty

Is that what you call it? Blush? So much of it. Too much of it. And strapless. And all of a similar shape. Let’s start with Amy Adams who...I mean Duana and I hated it the minute we saw it. Look at the bottom. It’s sh-tting tulle. The dress is SH-ITTING tulle. Here it comes, you ready? It’s sh-tting tulle because. Full Story

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Post-Natal Pretend Face

December 3, 2012 20:44:08 Posted at December 3, 2012 20:44:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Vera Anderson/Getty

Megan Fox is promoting This Is 40. She was at a press conference in Beverly Hills the other day, one of her first official work engagements since having her baby, which, I don’t remember his name right now and can’t be bothered to Google but my point is that I can remember what Gwyneth Paltrow wore 12 years ago to a particular premiere and it’s just interesting the details your brain will hold on to. Full Story

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