Remember when I wrote yesterday that I was banking some goodwill?
Here's why: having surgery on my arm this morning. For those of you who are new to this blog, I f-cked it up in Cannes in 2008 after Mischa Barton bailed on an appearance that we were supposed to be covering. Click here for the full story. I blame her.
Anyway, at the time they inserted a rod to reattach my elbow which had fractured off and was floating away down my forearm. The rod itself is now, sort of, sliding out. See it on the x-rays? How close it is to my skin?
So I have to be at the hospital at 7am. Surgery starts at 10am, is expected to last 90 minutes if all goes as planned. And I'm going under which means there's a 3 hour recovery before they'll let me go home.
What I'm trying to say is that I can't blog today. Which sucks because Leonardo DiCaprio had his publicist issue a statement to let you know that he's single because people really want to believe he and Rihanna are doing it. Well, now I'm offended. His entire career there have been rumours up and down that he's banging this model or that model. There were a LOT of rumours that he was banging Miranda Kerr, remember? When she was still married to Orlando Bloom too. If there was any time to issue a statement, that would have been it. Silence from him then, though. But he can't handle a few weeks of speculation that he's hooking up with Rihanna? Everyone wants to hook up with Rihanna! Why the shame, asshole?
See? I'd much rather be working today. Unfortunately I couldn't get a late afternoon surgery appointment.
The surgeon says I should be good to go tomorrow though, back to writing, back to everything.
Sorry for the interruption to your gossip schedule and for the inconvenience.
Yours in gossip,