Check out the new cover of FLARE. I love this shot of Eva Mendes. I love the way it’s lit. If only we could all be lit so softly, so flatteringly. For some reason, I’m also really into the shot of her inside the magazine with her feet in the sink, picking her toes. If I walked in on a woman doing that, I’d find it incredibly sexy. I’d want to have sex with her, immediately.

Personal questions, not surprisingly, were off-limits. Especially about Ryan Gosling. So the interview is mostly fashion. And her style preference these days seems to be anti-body-con, sort of:

“It’s not that I’m against body-conscious clothes: I have worn them on the red carpet or out, but when I’m photographed in them, I always regret it. For me, it’s always been the easy way out. When I wear something a little more reveal- ing, I think, Oh, gosh, I should have been more creative.” Now when she has to slink into come-hither clothing for a film or photo shoot, Mendes sees it as just another role to play. “I don’t like when it’s just me and I’m not working. I don’t like feeling like I’m on display.”

I’m on a live talk show every single day. And my approach to wardrobe is also – please, no body-con. It’s probably only once a month that I wear something fitted. Everything else is boxy and slouchy. And I get criticised for it often: Lainey, what the f-ck are you wearing.

It’s just so much work! So I hear what she’s saying.

But let’s go back to Ryan Gosling. So…she wouldn’t talk about him but there was a dog called “George” with her. You know.

Maybe George is just really attached to her but that, in and of itself, is a statement. I’m with the man’s dog. I’m with the man.

And finally…

Can I get a little self-indulgent? A LOT self-indulgent?

Check out that cover. And now look under her left ear. In this issue, FLARE features an exclusive excerpt from my book, Listen To The Squawking Chicken – and Maureen, the writer of the article, actually joined me and the Squawking Chicken for dimsum one day. Click here to read the piece and to see the photos.