Assy Style Articles

Articles and photos related to Fashion faux pas, bad style, and other fashion no-nos.

One hat too try

January 20, 2015 17:43:48 Posted at January 20, 2015 17:43:48
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Luca Teuchmann/ Chad Buchanan/ Getty Images

As mentioned yesterday in the Smutty Roundup, Katie Holmes is in Berlin for Fashion Week. Today she was front row at the Marc Cain show. Beautiful coat. Love the sweater dress. And the boots. If she had quit there, we’d be good. But that hat… That hat takes it from steezy to try, non? The hat is the detail that makes it uncomfortable. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

Diane Kruger is a fancy plate

January 16, 2015 16:27:58 Posted at January 16, 2015 16:27:58
Sarah Posted by Sarah
Photos:
WENN

Diane Kruger attended the dumpster fire also known as the Critics’ Choice Awards and she wore this dress that looks like a fancy plate. It’s by Naeem Khan and while the styling is nothing special, I would really like to know what the name of this pattern is so that I can order some teacups. Full Story

View All 17 Photos

American Citizen at the CCAs

January 16, 2015 15:50:48 Posted at January 16, 2015 15:50:48
Sarah Posted by Sarah
Photos:
WENN

Reese Witherspoon, American Citizen, attended the sh*tshow that is the Critics’ Choice Awards last night and she looked totally done with everything from the very beginning. Host Michael Strahan did a bit with her in the first ten minutes of the show and I thought she was going to spit poison at him like a venomous cobra. Full Story

View All 12 Photos

Angelina gets friendly

January 16, 2015 14:11:25 Posted at January 16, 2015 14:11:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Christopher Polk/ Kevin Mazur/ Tiffany Rose/ Joe Scarnic/ Getty Images

F-ck. Can we rage first about her bullsh-t taste in clothing? This dress is SO old. And SO ugly. And SO … It’s the WORST. Because it’s so obvious. So obvious that she’s all about invoking the Elizabeth Taylor and Marilyn Monroe Old Hollywood vibe. You know why that worked for them? Because it was 50 years ago. Full Story

View All 34 Photos

Gwyneth sings in a fleshy jumpsuit

January 15, 2015 15:39:24 Posted at January 15, 2015 15:39:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Theo Wargo/ NBC/ Getty Images

If you hate her, oh and I know you do, these pictures will give you a lot of joy. Because… well… look at Gwyneth Paltrow in this fleshy pink jumpsuit continuing to promote Mortdecai on her own (thanks, Johnny Depp), on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. It only works well in one angle, and that comes later, when she’s singing with Jimmy and turns to the side. Full Story

View All 11 Photos

Ruth & Jake: a starry night

January 14, 2015 15:28:19 Posted at January 14, 2015 15:28:19
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Andrew H. Walker/ Walter McBride/ Getty Images

Opening night of Constellations on Broadway starring Ruth Wilson and Jake Gyllenhaal. The reviews have been largely positive. Click here for a broad collection of them including the NYT’s Ben Brantley, James Franco’s “little bitch”, who clearly prefers Jakey to The Artiste. Full Story

View All 26 Photos

Gwyneth Paltrow: Globes Worst Dressed & Best Presenter (Lainey)

January 12, 2015 18:12:07 Posted at January 12, 2015 18:12:07
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Handout/ Getty Images

The carpet came and went. No sign of Gwyneth. The show went longer, still no sign of my G. Then a shot during commercial break of her hanging out with Ethan Hawke and Jack Black, smiling, smug, a glimpse of pink… and I knew. I knew we’d have to wait for her. Because the later it goes, the closer we get to the Important Awards. Full Story

Amy Adams: Globes Worst Dressed (Duana)

January 12, 2015 17:25:36 Posted at January 12, 2015 17:25:36
Duana Posted by Duana
Photos:
Steve Granitz/ JB Lacroix/ Michael Kovac/ Michael Tullberg/ Getty Images

Oh, Amy Adams. Amy Adams. I have never really gotten Amy Adams. One day last week – two weeks ago? – I got a letter from someone who was I guess reading back through the archives, and was very angry with how mean I had been to Amy Adams. Months ago. I don’t think I’m that mean but I do think she’s just…she’s hard to take. Full Story

View All 12 Photos

Kerry Washington: Globes Risk-taker

January 12, 2015 09:08:58 Posted at January 12, 2015 09:08:58
Duana Posted by Duana
Photos:
Jason Merritt/ Frazer Harrison/ Steve Granitz/ Getty Images

When I was about nine, I found these shoes. Like I can see them plain as day. They were oxfords. Magenta with purple in the saddle part, stiff Kelly-green soles.The laces were sky-blue-and-white. My mother bought them for me even though I was probably going to grow out of them in five minutes. Later that week I was wearing them and fell into a swampy pond. Full Story

View All 11 Photos

NSFW - Allison Williams was better on another channel

January 12, 2015 08:31:29 Posted at January 12, 2015 08:31:29
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Steve Granitz/ Frazer Harrison/ MARK RALSTON/ Michael Kovac/ Jason Merritt/ Handout/ Getty Images

Some parts of this post are NSFW. For three years now I’ve been trying to figure out what it is about the way Allison Williams dresses that … doesn’t interest me at all. I think I’ve finally figured it out. She’s like the girl in school whose dad is the principal or one of the teachers. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

Maggie & Jake Gyllenhaal: the Globe siblings

January 12, 2015 07:54:49 Posted at January 12, 2015 07:54:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
MARK RALSTON/ Frazer Harrison/ Jeff Vespa/ Getty Images

How many times did Maggie Gyllenhaal refer to “my brother” when she was up there accepting her Golden Globe? A lot. That made me wonder… What does it take to pass the Maggie Gyllenhaal Test? If you want to be with Jakey, you have to pass the Maggie Test. Who, then, failed the Maggie Test? Did Reese Witherspoon? No drama there. Full Story

View All 15 Photos

Same dress, different fiancé?

January 9, 2015 18:56:11 Posted at January 9, 2015 18:56:11
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, INFphoto.com/ Splash

Sofia Vergara hit the gym yesterday in advance of Golden Globe weekend. Her new fiancé, Joe Meatball, was also seen in gym clothes, though these shots were taken of him after dinner with friends. You think she’s bringing him to the show? They’re properly engaged now. And she always had that other guy she was planning to marry with her at these events when they were together. Full Story

View All 13 Photos

Reese’s nomination print

December 12, 2014 18:31:00 Posted at December 12, 2014 18:31:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet

Reese Witherspoon stepped out yesterday, Golden Globe nomination day. And she was named in the Best Drama Actress category. This outfit… But this is SUCH an LA Wife outfit, non? All that’s missing is the Botox. But appropriate I guess for the weeks ahead – a lot of handshaking, a lot of deal-making, a lot of favour-asking, a lot of smiling. Full Story

View All 9 Photos

Is Amal pregnant?

December 9, 2014 15:25:48 Posted at December 9, 2014 15:25:48
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
AKM-GSI/ Splash

Amal and George Clooney were at Soho House in LA. Everyone is talking about these pictures. Click here to see. As you know, I f-cking hate bumpwatch. But fine. Is she pregnant? Or is it just the coat? Clooney’s rep has denied that she’s pregnant. Full Story