Brad Pitt’s fragrant fontrum part 2

October 17, 2012 16:29:08 Posted at October 17, 2012 16:29:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Oh good.

There’s a second version of Brad Pitt’s Chanel ad. This time he’s still offering his pretentiously poetic thoughts about the universe only he’s not on camera the whole time. Instead, while Brad speaks, models appear on screen in scenes that remind me of the trailer to Cloud Atlas.  You could say, I suppose, that it’s not as embarrassing as the first one since he’s not staring off into the nether-yond in black and white. But, again, that’s like sh-t and diarrhoea -- still far from good. And also, again, remember, Brad Pitt is one of the few actors, very few, who doesn’t have to do what he’s told anymore. He’s achieved a level of status and power where he can pretty much do whatever the f-ck he wants. And he CHOSE to do this.

Picture then how this all went down. Picture him, reading through the script, and APPROVING IT. Now you try. The words are here. Say them out loud. Do it. The whole thing. Open your mouth and make them come out:

It’s not a journey. Every journey ends but we go on. The world turns and we turn with it. Plans disappear. Dreams take over. But wherever I go there you are. My luck. My fate. My fortune. Chanel No5. Inevitable.

Did you punch yourself in the face?

I don’t want to buy Chanel No5. All I’ve learned from this whole thing is that:

1.Pitt Porn is missed.

2.Brad Pitt is a mouth-breather.

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