Absence creates hope

December 2, 2009 12:45:00 Posted at December 2, 2009 12:45:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

We were about to call it on Gossip Girl. Then we had to suspend the chats because Michelle went to Italy forever and Duana went to Austin forever and I went nowhere and suddenly, after 3 missed episodes, the show surged. Coincidence or conspiracy?

Thank you for your emails (and some demands) wondering about our recaps.

Back now just in time to see Serena become Monica Lewinsky. Good. Lily keeping more secrets. Good. Politician’s wife is the new Georgina. Great. Trip is revolting. Bad but good.

Chuck is moral and kind and considerate?

NO. Stop. It must stop.

Sacrificing Chuck’s Bass-ness to make the show better can’t be the only solution.

Our discussion is below. Please note, pie lust is what happens when Dan and Vanessa come on the tv.

Also, Blake Lively is hosting SNL this weekend. Am I crazy? Because I kinda think she’ll be cool. MUCH cooler than January Jones, oh lawd.

Gossip Girl Weekly

Lainey: we missed chatting about the nails. THE NAILS.

Michelle: I KNOW!

Duana: I'm going to miss HilDuff

Michelle: Ok Lily can explain everything apparently

Lainey: is there a person whose job is simply to provide tv penmanship?

Duana: Who doesn't come home for Thanksgiving?

Michelle: Where is Jenny's hideous make up?

Lainey: cotillion is over.

Duana: What exactly does Lily see in Rufus' overgrown teenagerness?

Duana: I HAAAATE TRIP

Lainey: he's in Howl with James Franco.

Michelle: Really? I actually like him.

Lainey: can't Jenny do him a favour and NOT wear heels in scenes with Eric?

Duana: S looks pretty here.

Michelle: James Franco mention noted. I predict 2 more.

Lainey: are we getting an S and T sex scene?

Duana: Did Blake get la microdermabrasion?

Michelle: She is glowing. Blair's hair sucks.

Duana: If you were gonna be 'good', S, you wouldn't have brought up Pay-Per-View.

Lainey: DVDs are more g-rated?

Duana: like her bag though.

Lainey: poor Rihanna joke. Poor.

Michelle: 18-year-old blond coincidence. Amazing

Duana: Dan nodded into the phone. Way to go, Dan. Also, Dan and Nate love each other. Obviously

Michelle: I agree. Nate and Dan forever.

Lainey: What's their theme song?

Duana: "Blake's got a new face"?

Duana: Is Dan in an Aeron? I know a lot of people buying Aerons this week

Lainey: i wouldn't know. i don't have a house.

Michelle: I had to Google what an Aeron is....

Lainey: my rental is getting sold. Such a buzzkill

Duana: How many times did she rehearse that tea name?

Duana: What did you EXPECT, S?

Lainey: Aw... Chace was so cute there pretending to crush on a girl.

Duana: Why did Lily get a matriarch's voice?

Duana: And um...she can't wailk.

Lainey: i just saw SJP in an ad for a hugh grant movie. holy sh*t they made her look BAD.

Duana: Awww, I even miss the mention of HilDuff! Who knew, show?

Michelle: Bitches of Eastwick - Du is this probably getting made now?

Lainey: Vanessa is trying to kill my love for the colour purple. like the actual colour, not the book.

Duana: Well, there's a new show called "Eastwick" so it might be a tie-in

Lainey: i heard eastwick is already canned?

Duana: who does do holidays well? Other than the Ericksens on HIMYM?

Michelle: Vanessa's hair has gotten better. I think we need to recognize that officially.

Duana: Maybe this is why Americans go postal. Too much family togetherness too close
together. If they had almost two months like us, maybe it would be OK

Duana: I want that elevator as a headboard

Duana: I really really like her coat.

Michelle: I was hoping Anthro might have a reasonable knock off of it.

Duana: And we have kissing!

Lainey: ew. ew. ew. it's a good thing that i'm so repulsed by that, right?

Duana: Dorota's FACE!

Lainey: Ummm...Dorota has another JOB? WHAT?

Duana: Why is eleanor such a bitch?

Michelle: Really? I like her.

Duana: WHAT are you TALKING About?

Lainey: Me?

Duana: No I was being Eleanor

Duana: Baby stuff, right?

Duana: CALLED IT!

Duana: Called it two seconds before, but I'm gonna say it counts

Lainey: i heard you.

Michelle: I agree - it counts!

Michelle: Chuck's tie knot - very interesting.

Lainey: how does Chuck know so much about life and what happens to other women?

Duana: On Nate, wondering what a sledgehammer is.

Duana: Sometimes I feel headache commercials give me a headache

Lainey: i accidentally skipped ahead on dvr and you will love Jenny's TG outfit.

Duana: She is wearing what, a nightie?

Duana: OK, points for Lily knowing that Dorota and Banya are in love

Duana: OK, I kind of love Vanessa's dress.

Duana: Dan, could you have tucked in your shirt? Ass.

Michelle: I still think Lily and her mother is the best casting ever. They looked related.

Duana: Actually so do Blair and Eleanor

Lainey: So i'm a child. i need it explained. Do S and Trip actually f-ck?

Michelle: I don't think they have yet.

Duana: strong work ethic - euphemism in three, twoo...

Duana: I doubt they did it in the elevator

Duana: HAHAHAH Eleanor. You won back my love

Lainey: i love Blair so much. I just need a moment like that once a show.

Lainey: So Chuck has outlawed illicit affairs in his hotel? CHUCK BASS?

Michelle: After his Lost Weekend?

Duana: Do you think Chace learns his lines phonetically?

Lainey: like Jessica Simpson?

Michelle: Perfect couple.

Duana: "A whispered aside". Writers! I heart you!

Michelle: Isn't this song old?

Duana: M, is this song a reference to that other show by Schwartz?

Duana: What the hell is that show? Oh yes, the OC

Michelle: I feel like I'm watching Dynasty.

Duana: Potato dis.

Lainey: they're trying to recreate the passover ep. Terribly.

Duana: What's the biggest turkey you've ever had?

Michelle: We only ever have capon because our family is so small!

Duana: (I should tell my mom that, she rants about turkey every year!)

Lainey: Chinese have pork for Thanksgiving

Duana: I fantasize about a big dinner like this. TV taught me to expect it.

Duana: one more stormout!

Michelle: Maybe we should stage a dinner like this and have Du write us lines.

Lainey: i've been to several of these. They're awesome unless you're a stormer.

Duana: nice!

Michelle: Lily lays down the law.

Duana: Season three and we've never had a kickout

Duana: you'd realize what you'd become = the most used line on this show

Duana: AAAAAAAAAAND no parents for Blair

Michelle: Isn't her Dad in Paris too?

Duana: yep

Lainey: no school either.

Michelle: So Dorota must be pregnant

Duana: I HOPE SO

Lainey: Vanessa and the meddling mother. Explains everything.

Michelle: Is S wearing a catsuit?!

Duana: would you wait around at the house of your husband's mistress for an apology?

Michelle: First the Lee Press On Nails last week, and now the cat suit? C'mon.

Lainey: she still has the press ons.

Michelle: Does she? Those are Method for any mistresses?

Lainey: I recall seeing them on at least 2 of Tiger’s.

Duana: I love how all it takes to get these two back together is the other one screwing up

Duana: Remember Paris?

Lainey: Remember Paris?

Michelle: Paris.

Duana: Allons-y! Leighton's never taken French

Lainey: Lily has no peripheral vision.

Duana: Cece is still covering for her

Michelle: She went to see Dr. VDW

Lainey: for 2 months?

Duana: Tom Collichio reference!

Duana: So does Dorota's outfit have matching collar and cuffs?

Michelle: She learned from Blair.

Lainey: Dan is exhausting. And he's barely in the show.

Duana: OK yes, her hair is better.

Michelle: I find it annoying that everyone "sees it on his face."

Lainey: i see elf on his face.

Duana: When did Nate get moral?

Duana: I mean, I know 'moral' is "I love Serena" but still

Lainey: when did Chuck become soft? UGH.

Duana: Blair beside Guitar – incongruous

Duana: OH damn

Michelle: When I was 19, I was working at camp. Serena is running off with a married Congressman.

Duana: albeit a 24 year old congressman

Michelle: All in a catsuit.

Duana: I was also working at camp at 19.

Lainey: i didn't mind Lively's "mad" face there. Even the mumbling worked.

Lainey: i want pie. SO MUCH.

Duana: (we'll make pie when you come)

Michelle: (i don't like pumpkin pie!)

Lainey: (what kind?)

Duana: (raspberry. Because Michelle doesn't like pumpkin)

Lainey: (i like raspberry)

Michelle: (me too!)

Duana: Was Nate waiting for her in the lobby?

Michelle: He took the service elevator with Dorota.

Duana: I mean, I guess it's a good place to wait for her

Michelle: S is in a Archibald sandwich

Duana: Poor S, caught between two blondes of bland

Lainey: Trip skeeves me out.

Duana: I'm SAYING!

Lainey: like...the way he rolled down the window, the profile, SKEEVE.

Michelle: I'm tearing up about Dorota and Vanya.

Duana: Nobody ate anything but pie this ep

Lainey: pie porn.

Duana: I'm tired of them knowing more than us in that letter.

Lainey: Why is Chuck so nice?

Lainey: The nails. and the skeeve. In the limo. It's too much.

Lainey: and THAT’s why the coats were so similar. Like costume designers would ever make a mistake like that.

Duana: OK, so....Serena's nt really a van der Woodsen? She's rufus'?

Duana: Or something?

Michelle: I doubt it.

Michelle: Probably something to do with Lily.

Lainey: but the point is... I CARE.

Lainey: Show making comeback?

Duana: I care too

Michelle: Perhaps. But I think Chuck has to get nasty again.

Duana: But I care because everyone is in the same room

Michelle: Good point.

Duana: Sigh. I want to believe

Lainey: i need something sweet. I can't stop thinking about pie.

Michelle: i want Lindt white chocolate

Duana: I want sour cherry blasters

Duana: My tastes are low-brow

Lainey: i have no chocolate in this house. That should be a bylaw violation.


Photos from Wenn.com and PPNY/GSNY/Splashnewsonline.com

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