This is Monaco’s Prince Albert participating in the traditional Christmas bath yesterday in, I guess?, royal swimwear? And a blue bathrobe. Just in case you were wondering what Charlene of Serenity goes to bed with every night. Speaking of Her Highness of Prison, she was allowed to go to Germany this weekend for a charity gala. Full Story

You know when someone super nerdy stands next to something super nerdy the nerdy-ness of the two combined more than doubles? This is why Comic-Con is so awesome. When thousands of them are nerd herding there together, their individual nerd components bump together and, like heating matter in a flask, it expands to explosive levels. Full Story

Remember when Charlene of Serenity had to kiss Prince Albert on the balcony of the palace right after their civil ceremony and she looked like she wanted to end her life? Here, let me attach a photo to remind you, just in case that memory isn’t strong enough in your mind. Well she was back on the balcony this weekend for Monaco National Day celebrations and this time she managed to control her nausea. Full Story

Monaco National Day is on Saturday. It will be the first for Charlene as the principality’s Serene Highness. She was there last year but they weren’t married yet, obviously. (I don’t mean to be mean but...um... Stephanie, Jesus, she looks frighteningly bad.)Anyway, the Royal Family, leading up to the holiday, is attending various charity events to celebrate and to give back to the people. Full Story

How much do you love that shot of Julie Andrews at the table with Prince Albert and Her Serenity Charlene of Monaco? God he seems like such a buffoon. Here they are, the newlyweds Grimaldi in New York last night at the Princess Grace Awards Gala. Charlene, as you can see, was as docile as ever. Very beautiful but also very numb. Full Story

Prince Albert and Prison Bride Charlene Serenity welcomed Croatian President Ivo Josipovic to Monaco yesterday. It was a state visit. And the First Lady would have been required to be there even though she probably preferred hanging out in Paris where she was earlier this week and where she appeared much livelier - click here Full Story

Well this is new. Prince Albert was spotted at two consecutive official events the last few weeks without the Supreme Serenity High Princess Charlene at his side prompting many to wonder whether or not she was negotiating her escape. Yesterday however Charlene emerged alone on official royal duty - she attended the traditional mass of the Feast of Saint Michael in a small town called Turbie in the hills of Monaco. Full Story

Look at him in the first photo attached, glancing back at his wife, the Serene Highness of Captivity Princess Charlene, as if he can barely stand her, and can’t be bothered to conceal it. Dick. The Monte Carlo Golf Club was celebrating its 100th anniversary on Sunday. So Prince Albert of Monaco had to show up for the occasion, dragging his nauseous bride along for the photo opportunity, the best illustration of “a smile that doesn’t reach the eyes” that I’ve ever seen. Full Story

Prince Albert of Monaco and his Serene Prisoner Charlene Wittstock attended the Red Cross Ball in Monte Carlo the other night. She tried to look…happier. And many people have noted that she does indeed look less …tortured?... than she did on her wedding day and after. Really? I don’t see it. Full Story

Her Serene Highness Princess Charlene and her husband Prince Albert of Monaco don’t appreciate that we keep thinking that she’s being held prisoner in a white castle. They insist that Charlene did not try to escape three times before her wedding and eventually had her passport confiscated and have filed papers in French court against L’Express Magazine for fuelling what they call “false rumours” about their relationship. Full Story

She allegedly tried to escape him three times and was supposedly recaptured each time, the final time just days before the wedding that resulted in her passport getting confiscated. As you know, Her Serene Highness Prisoner Charlene of Monaco married Prince Albert and wept at the wedding amid new reports that he was to submit to paternity tests for yet another child out of wedlock while they were seriously dating and just before he proposed. Full Story

Prisoner Bride Charlene Wittstock, the Serene Highness of Monaco, and her husband Prince Albert have ended their honeymoon in South Africa and returned home so that he can deal with the DNA test and the latest paternity claim. There are reports coming out of South Africa however that when they were there, they were sleeping in separate hotels and now that they’ve cut short their holiday, it’s convinced people even more that Charlene has been put on lockdown. Full Story

It was a week ago today that Her Serene Highness The Princess of Monaco Charlene Wittstock and Prince Albert showed us the first in what would eventually be a series of awkward kisses and interactions at their splashy wedding. The couple is on honeymoon in South Africa and attended a dinner party last night. Full Story

Over in Monaco, Prince Albert married Charlene Wittstock. Rumour has it they confiscated her passport... what??? I’m telling you, that’s what the papers have reported even though the royals are vehemently denying it. It’s almost medieval, non? Anyway, the spectacular spectacular is happening later. Full Story