Assy Style Articles

Articles and photos related to Fashion faux pas, bad style, and other fashion no-nos.

JLO’s MET Dragon

May 5, 2015 11:37:29 Posted at May 5, 2015 11:37:29
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jamie McCarthy/ Larry Busacca/ Kevin Mazur/ Rabbani and Solimene Photography/ John Lamparski/ Getty Images

It’s Versace. But it could also have been Zuhair Murad. What’s the difference? Beading held together by pantyhose – who can tell it apart? Doesn’t matter if there’s a dragon because f-ck, I’m so over it. I’m so over JLO in these kinds of dresses. I’m so over “body-con” as a substitute for imagination. Full Story

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Dakota Johnson: MET Eyes

May 5, 2015 11:19:32 Posted at May 5, 2015 11:19:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Larry Busacca/ Jamie McCarthy/ Rabbani and Solimene Photography/ Taylor Hill/ Getty Images

So… Dakota Johnson. In Chanel. Nothing in the dress speaks to the theme of the MET Gala. And then you look at her eyes. And because it’s the MET Gala and the theme is China: Through The Looking Glass, and her dress isn’t China at all, now I’m wondering if she and her makeup artist were like, we’ll just give you some slanty eyes and you’re good to go! I just spent several minutes looking at photos of her through the Fifty Shades press tour. Full Story

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Rachel Weisz: Worst MET Disappointment

May 5, 2015 06:50:05 Posted at May 5, 2015 06:50:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Kevin Mazur/ Taylor Hill/ Getty Images

Was it a last minute decision? Like, she wasn’t intending to go but decided to go anyway and just yanked something serviceable out of the closet that didn’t need to be pressed? Then again, it’s Chanel. I’ve no doubt Rachel Weisz has some Chanel lying around but this is couture so… it probably wasn’t yanked from anywhere. Full Story

Kate Hudson: Worst Gold at the MET

May 5, 2015 05:01:25 Posted at May 5, 2015 05:01:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Kevin Mazur/ Dimitrios Kambouris/ Larry Busacca/ Getty Images

As I noted in the open, gold, red, and green, these are the favoured Chinese colours. There was a lot of gold, red, and green at the MET Gala. Some of it done well, with just the right amount of Chinese cheesy, and some of it… well… Kate Hudson in Michael Kors was a mess. The problem is the hair. Full Story

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Kristen Wiig: MET Yellow

May 5, 2015 04:32:25 Posted at May 5, 2015 04:32:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Dimitrios Kambouris/ Jamie McCarthy/ Kevin Mazur/ Larry Busacca/ Getty Images

Please note that yellow is not gold. On this night, it doesn’t substitute for gold. Here’s what Duana texted me about Kristen Wiig’s dress: Also f-ck off, Kristen Wiig. Stop it now. And my response: That yellow made me ANGRY. Angry because … Prabal Gurung isn’t usually this unremarkable. Full Story

Emma Roberts: the other MET Chopsticks

May 5, 2015 03:58:32 Posted at May 5, 2015 03:58:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Larry Busacca/ Kevin Mazur/ Jamie McCarthy/ Getty Images

Not gonna rage too hard on Emma Roberts for the dumbass chopsticks in her hair. You know why? Her dress is punishment enough. She’s like the Kate Upton of 2015. You remember Kate Upton’s appearances at the MET Gala, don’t you? They’re tragic. When Kate Upton shows up at the MET Gala, she’s almost always in a “here just wear this” dress. Full Story

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It’s not even noon…

April 21, 2015 16:35:56 Posted at April 21, 2015 16:35:56
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, XactpiX/ 247PAPS.TV/ Splash News, Raymond Hall/ Getty Images

What time is it in New York right now (as I’m writing this)? 11:54am Blake Lively is on the morning circuit to promote The Age Of Adaline. She’s changed… I don’t know…. I’ve lost count how many times. It’s a lot of times. My least favourite is the pink and black wrap dress. Full Story

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Blake’s premiere in leather, feather, and lace

April 20, 2015 14:48:04 Posted at April 20, 2015 14:48:04
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Jamie McCarthy/ Getty Images

Blake Lively at The Age Of Adaline New York premiere last night. She posed on the carpet with the Khaleesi’s boyfriend, Michiel Huisman in a red Monique Lhuillier with a leather wraparound and a feathered skirt. ENOUGH WITH THE FEATHERED SKIRTS. Ryan Reynolds was back in Vancouver working on Deadpool. Full Story

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Bradley Cooper covers TIME 100, is Single & Fabulous?

April 16, 2015 16:57:48 Posted at April 16, 2015 16:57:48
Joanna Posted by Joanna

“This…. is quite a headshot.” That’s the title of the email I sent to Lainey this morning, after seeing Bradley Cooper on the cover of TIME’s 100 Most Influential People list. Just take a look at the photo. Is he worthy? Sure. Coops has four Oscar nominations to his name from the past three years… and he's likely to earn a Tony nomination for his terrific work in The Elephant Man too. Full Story

Ryan Gosling goes dark

April 16, 2015 15:35:00 Posted at April 16, 2015 15:35:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Splash

Have you seen Ryan Gosling in The United States Of Leland? It was years ago. His character had dark hair. He was adorable. Ryan Gosling is currently working on The Big Short. His character has dark hair. He is not adorable. Maybe it’s age. OMG, in this case, a rare case, is age actually gender democratic? Ryan Gosling, the celebrity human pillow, now in his 30s, doesn’t look good with dark hair. Full Story

Shoes for Beyonce

April 15, 2015 15:32:15 Posted at April 15, 2015 15:32:15
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Frazer Harrison /Stefanie Keenan/ Getty Images

Beyonce was in Beverly Hills last night for the opening of the Giuseppe Zanotti boutique and was personally toured through the space by Giuseppe himself. Which basically means she gets one of everything and the next 5 seasons too…? Is that enough though? It’s not like Beyonce can’t afford to buy her own shoes. Full Story

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Brad Pitt’s officially your dad

April 10, 2015 17:25:47 Posted at April 10, 2015 17:25:47
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Splash

I posted shots of Brad Pitt’s grey beard in New Orleans the other day – click here for a refresher. But he was wearing his own clothes that day and hat. This time, he’s properly in costume on the set of The Big Short. And…well… the hair doesn’t match the beard, for starters. Full Story

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Britney & Iggy: Pretty Girls

April 9, 2015 20:08:44 Posted at April 9, 2015 20:08:44
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Mariotto/ Chiva/ INFphoto.com/ Splash News

I feel compelled to repeat this whenever I write about Iggy Azalea: I am not a believer. The music does nothing for me. And the personality, I mean, I just don't care. Do you care? If you care, convince me why I should. Anyway, Iggy and Britney are collaborating on a new song called Pretty Girls. Full Story

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Gosling’s Lost River in Paris

April 8, 2015 16:06:16 Posted at April 8, 2015 16:06:16
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
KCS Presse/ Splash News

Ryan Gosling has been in Paris the last couple of days promoting Lost River. Eleven months ago, in France, he presented his film at the Cannes Film Festival to pretty sh-tty reviews. The critics seemed to take it so personally that Gosling’s directorial debut wasn’t as impressive as his acting efforts. Full Story

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