Have you noticed that all of Lance Armstrong’s loves look the same? Or, more precisely, they all look very similar to Kristin Armstrong, his first wife? Sheryl Crow and Tori Burch in particular have the same face.  Lance is a very, very good liar and bully, but you know what he doesn’t get enough credit for? Lance, amazingly, fell exclusively for very discreet women. Full Story

We have hockey on all the time during Round 1 of the NHL playoffs. If it’s the same at your place, you know that you get to know the commercials really well this time of year. And they have one ad on repeat that is MAKING ME CRAZY.It’s some video game. A dude jumps off a building while remembering all the people he shot up in the war. Full Story

Did you go? I’ve heard from a few of you who were there. SO MANY PEOPLE WERE THERE! I would have wanted to be there. But, um, even if I could have been there, I probably would have last minute pussied out of being there because of the toilet situation. I can’t use the portable kind. And I am so neurotic about that sh-t that it would be the only thing on my mind. Full Story

GOOP is still tight with Tracy Anderson. Or... GOOP has money in Tracy Anderson’s Method and needs to protect her investment. Whatever the reason, today’s newsletter is about fitness and, specifically, Anderson’s fitness system. Note however they way Gwyneth words her introduction:“Many of you may already know of my passion for the Tracy Anderson Method and my investment in it. Full Story

Fabulous at 41! celebrated her birthday in Mexico with friends Sheryl Crow, Courteney Cox, and a flabby Spittle tagged along too. Gross. It’s not that men can’t gain weight. But a man who is constantly being shoved in my face as some kind of super stud should not be looking like this. Wasn’t he sticking his tongue down some random’s throat just last week? And he was still invited to join the party? Fabulous at 41!’s self esteem must be at an all time low. Full Story

All her friends with babies showed up last night at the Rock a Little, Feed a Lot benefit concert in aid of LA Regional Food Bank & Feed America but Jennifer Aniston was missing. Where’s Jen? Probably on a beach somewhere. So here are Sheryl Crow and Isla Fisher and David Arquette and Friends Courteney Cox and Lisa Kudrow. Full Story

In Jane Bussman’s The Worst Date Ever (which you MUST read if you haven’t already) she calls it The Golden Age of Stupid, a generation of twats and toffs with no discernable personality, skill, or, for that matter, ability to communicate. This is the generation that is currently raping the word DIVA. Full Story

She hasn’t had much success on red carpets, has she? Remember a few years ago with Lance Armstrong she showed up in a bright yellow gown with her stomach cut out? This one isn’t much better. This one looks like it’s been washed and dried. You know when you buy a blouse for $30 from the Chinese Mall and it starts to pill after the second use? This is a Chinese Mall dress. Full Story

Sheryl Crow inexplicably decided to shoot her mouth off recently about her friendship with Jennifer Aniston, insisting that neither of them were the “dumpees” in their respective high profile relationships: “For both of us, the perceived idea is that, in our big relationships, we both got dumped. Full Story

Those Olsen Twins are rich. Super super super rich. But it doesn’t mean they aren’t both ass backwards when it comes to picking men. Mary Kate is rumoured to be dating that useless f&cking scum Sean Avery who incidentally is denying he disparaged a man for having cancer disparaged a man for having cancer Full Story