There is a hilarious story today at Page Six about Kellan Lutz and how he’s on Raya under a fake name, Sebastian. I really, really want this to be his profile photo:

Sebastian, the scholar, loves books and nature.

I have a friend, M, who lives in LA. M is gorgeous. Like no debate gorgeous. He’s SO hot. Tall, well dressed, sexy, great moves, and articulate. Couple of weeks ago we were at a junket, killing time. And he opens up his Raya, starts showing it to me. He’s obsessed with it.

I was intimidated. And relieved. Relieved to not have to worry about being rejected by Raya because I certainly would be if I were single. So, already, when you get onto Raya, you’re already feeling like you’ve gotten into an exclusive club. Which brings us back to Kellan Lutz.

Kellan Lutz has supposedly joined an highly curated dating app and still feels the need to go under an alias because, what?, he’s worried about getting catfished by a Twi-Hard? Or because he knows…there are no Twi-Hards here. And, well, among these Los Angeles special snowflakes, I’m the 6th on the Twilight call-sheet who once read in a tree and declared I’d win an Oscar? So I better change my name.

To Sebastian. And in my opinion, his reference for Sebastian is Cruel Intentions. Right? Kellan Lutz is so TOTALLY trying to be Sebastian Valmont!