Worst Oscar Taffeta: Jennifer Aniston

February 25, 2013 17:52:31 Posted at February 25, 2013 17:52:31
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
BROWN /KLAMAR /Merritt /Harrison /Djansezian /Buckner /Winter /Beck /Getty Images

I hate red. I hate taffeta. Taffeta and red is like watching Big Bang Theory and Two And A Half Men back to back. It’s sh-t + sh-t, don’t care if it’s Valentino. And Jennifer Aniston chose to wear it last night at the Oscars.

Look, credit to her for not wearing black again. But …that’s it.

What’s wrong with taffeta?

There’s a reason why taffeta shows up at the prom so much: it’s a starter fabric; it’s fabric for girls becoming women who are starting to develop their own style. Taffeta isn’t versatile. There’s only so much you can do with it. It doesn’t move. It restricts you to certain shapes.

A woman like Jennifer Aniston, the hope is that she’d have graduated beyond taffeta by now. This is why it seems so incongruous on the Anistons and the Julie Bowens of the world. There is more sophistication available. Show it to us.

Or maybe prommy was the point? It was Jen and Justin Theroux’s first Oscars. They were more affectionate on this carpet than they’ve ever been. There was even a forehead kiss at the Vanity Fair party. And this photo that I’ve attached first is actually kinda similar to that one wedding shot that she and Brad Pitt released in 2001, remember? Will put side by side.

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