Here’s a novel idea: write before you can act. Tina Fey became famous for her brain and her sense of humour stands today as the most respected woman in the business. Do parent pimps look to Tina Fey for inspiration? Do they enroll their kids in creative writing instead of Star Search? Doubtful. Full Story

This is the only photo I could find. Which is shocking. Worst dressed photos sell almost as briskly as best dressed ones. …the f&ck was she thinking??? Am most offended by the small details. Like those shoes. Those Asian massage parlour shoes. Jessica Simpson shoes. Shoes for women with two names - Betty Lou, Connie Sue, Sally Mae, Peggy Lee – who aspire to aging like Dolly Parton: garish makeup, bleached out hair, frosty blue eye shadow, and two pigs fighting under a blanket that make up her ass. Full Story

Size Two wore her hair for a small town prom. Or a small town wedding circa 1995. How the f&ck does this get past security? How the f&ck did she find a stylist even willing to do this? Ken Paves wouldn’t do this! Even Ken Paves would draw the line at this! I’m telling you…when you have to go out of state to get your hair did, it’s wrong. Full Story

Super bob. Age appropriate bob. Unfussy and uncomplicated and it looks amazing on her. Her body looks amazing on her too. But some say Felicity Huffman can be a little too body focused… A lot of attention is being paid of late to young actresses on tv and their dangerous desires to be thin. Last week on one of the entertainment dailies, they profiled the pressure all women in Hollywood face to stay skinny. Full Story

Too much hanging out with Posh. This is vintage Victoria Beckham: make everyone around you look worse. It’s working with Eva Longoria. And of course, it’s easy enough with Ken Paves cocking up her hair. The dress doesn’t help either. Of course it’s f&cking Marchesa! Photos from Wenn.com  Full Story

Everyone is losing their sh*t today over her dress. Really? She’s gorgeous, yes. Her skin is ridiculous, yes. Body is the tightest, yes. But the dress? Hate the crushed velvet. And that ratty fringe hanging off of it. Like some kind of converted 70s disco carpet from a night club with the lingering smell of cigarettes and sweat all over it and a stain in the back that you can’t scrub off. Full Story

Never mind that his boyfriend looks like a young waxy gay Val Kilmer. It’s not important. What’s important is that NPH is the hotness. And I want him. So poised, so self assured, so damn sexy in his confidence, such an inspiration for Zac Efron when he finally realises what he’s missing. Full Story

Another carpet, another case of the BitchFace. She tried to smile and it almost incapacitated her. My mother calls it Fu Gwa Gon: Dry Bitter Melon Peels. Her godson married a Fu Gwa Gon. Even when she’s happy she looks like she’s at a funeral. One day a few years ago, mother was playing mahjong and Fu Gwa Gon was sitting in her eyeline. Full Story

Is it just me or did the 35 year old seem like she was sucking in so hard she could barely breathe? I get that everyone there was Spanxing it last night, holding in every last imaginary ripple, every curve that starvation could not kill, faint and woozy from a week’s worth of eating air… but Hayden Panettiere seemed especially uncomfortable. Full Story

Her own dress was boring as f&ck. The dress she designed for the statue girls was boring as f&ck. And her presentation skills were the most boring as f&ck. So boring that poor David Boreanaz who unfortunately had to share the stage with her was so bored he almost fell asleep handing out the award. Full Story

Katherine Heigl didn’t show but he called out the ungrateful Princess of Asstalk for the ungrateful asstalker she is: “At this point I had planned on doing a few more jokes…but Katherine Heigl told me she didn’t think my material was Emmy-worthy.” Love, love, love. Photo from SPLASH Full Story

She’s perfect. And she glowed. And she lost to Tina Fey. Isn’t it an honour to lose to Tina Fey? I’d lose to Tina Fey every day and feel complete. Check out America Ferrera in a black gown she was born to wear. If she’s glowing it might be because she’s happy to be rid of Lindsay Lohan for now. Full Story

She brought her parents. And she was tiny. Ultra tiny. But at least she wasn’t her usual ultra bitch. Not that that’s a bad thing. That Sandra Oh has a bite. That she is not an easy woman. That she can be testy and irritable and totally unaccommodating. That she is annoyed often and doesn’t hesitate to communicate it. Full Story

She’s not a fashion girl. So the dress… it’s obviously not the best. Far from the best. But it was a sweet effort, if not the most fashionable. Let’s focus instead on premiere week. The Office is back on Thursday and do we worry for Jim and Pam? It’s not television if there’s no difficulty. Full Story