Mimi (barely) kicks off
Janet Mayer/ Jackson Lee/ Splash
It’s amazing, isn’t it? Our Mimi’s ability to keep reinventing the art of doing as little as possible? Mimi delivered two performances at the NFL kickoff last night. Sort of. For Triumphant, she appeared only halfway through the song, showing up in a pre-recorded video for the beginning with the title FASHIONABLY LATE as she sat in the backseat of a car, moving only her upper body. That’s the key, you see? She’s a f-cking Olympian above the waist. It’s only a problem if you ask her to use her legs.
Which she did, but only at the midpoint, needing to be helped down a short flight of stairs, and then waving her arms around a microphone as her mullet dress breezed around her in the face of what was likely several wind machines.
God I love her so much.
Later on she managed to drag her ass back out for a medley of some of her greatest hits in a black dress and with one of her dogs, obviously. I mean, why wouldn’t a jack russell terrier be on stage with Mimi during a medley of her greatest hits? Are you stunned that she was able to bend down? And stand back up? Also, Mimi wears white underwear.
American Idol auditions begin in a couple of weeks. I keep asking this question but it’s because the answer is going to be so full of amazing: HOW is she going to stay on schedule?