Is there a kids’ table?
Queen Elizabeth hosted a reception for Foreign Monarchs at Windsor Castle today. As in you were only invited if you are royalty, literally. The Cambridges and Hot Harry were there. Please God kill Kate’s pink square toe satin shoes I hate them SO much.
I like to imagine that the three of them stayed close through the event. Like the younger cousins at a family dinner. That might not be too far from the truth, you know. After all, Harry isn’t exactly shy about hiding the fact that he hates wearing dinner jackets. If he hates wearing dinner jackets, he’s probably not crazy about talking to the Royal Empress of Some Country To The East. All Harry wants to do is sit at the kids’ table and text his friends about where to meet up later to get sh-tfaced.
Or maybe Hot Harry can surreptitiously head to the bathroom when Princess Serenity gets up to powder her nose.
This is my favourite new daydream. Hot Harry enters the stall. He locks it behind him. Charlene can’t breathe. He presses Her Sereneness up against the site, lifts her up by the waist, and tells her...
I have come to rescue you.
Can’t get enough of these newlyweds fake-smiling through their conversation with each other.