How long before he starts tweeting about her tits
Katy Perry has marvellous ones. And, well, John Mayer isn’t exactly known for under-sharing. So it’s true then - Katy and John are officially a thing now, seen leaving Chateau Marmont together last night in his car, clearly ready to go public. You can imagine how much that would have swollen his dick, right? No Shame Face for John Mayer this time! John Mayer adds yet another babe (I hate this word but it’s fitting here) to his long list of babes including Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson, Minka Kelly, Jennifer Aniston, and Taylor Swift...
Who is actually quite friendly with Katy Perry. And while I know everyone should be over it by now (but not really because who gets over these things, actually ?) that might not only be awkward but, more importantly, think of the potential for Good Gossip. Think of what a front row at the MTV VMAs might look like with Katy and Taylor sandwiched between a Kennedy and a pissy-faced Mayer.
This is when you remember how young Katy Perry still is. She recently told ELLE that:
“I'm a woman who likes to be courted–strongly. Never say never, I guess you'd say. I’ll let love take the lead on that."
That was Russell Brand’s approach. He pretty much announced to the world, on stage with a microphone in his hand, that he was trying to get with her. Obviously it worked. She loved it. She was flattered by it. She would be flattered by a douchebag like John Mayer using big smart book words on her how attractive, stimulating, and “different” she is. Come on. You know that’s his move. And you know her move too. Katy Perry in a power skirt all like “I am different, which is why it won’t happen to me, what he’s done to the others”. If only they knew how many times this has already been written...
Still, if Jessica Simpson was “sexual napalm”, how will he possibly describe Katy Perry? Really looking forward to that.