Gross Articles

No Slum Love at the MET Gala?

May 6, 2013 16:39:27 Posted at May 6, 2013 16:39:27
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Ralph Notaro/ Splash

It’s enough that Kanye West somehow talked Anna Wintour into allowing Kanye West’s girlfriend to be there tonight. Can you imagine if JLO’s Slum Bear was accepted too? It could still happen. But they were in Miami yesterday shooting her new video so I feel like maybe we’ll be spared from being grossed out. Full Story

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Ryan Gosling is Aggro Jealous Boyfriend?

April 1, 2013 14:22:40 Posted at April 1, 2013 14:22:40
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, FameFlynet

So according to Page Six, Ryan Gosling turned into Aggro Jealous Boyfriend on Friday when he was out with Eva Mendes in New York. Apparently a fashion photographer who’d recently worked with Mendes called over to her “Hey, baby!” and an eyewitness says: “Ryan completely flipped out, and it got heated. Full Story

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Belly Cupping: Fergie edition

March 25, 2013 15:45:26 Posted at March 25, 2013 15:45:26
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, FameFlynet, Frazer Harrison/ Kevin Mazur/KCA2013/ Getty

Oh Jesus. I’d rather see the Beyonce armpit pose than have to endure another edition of Celebrity Belly Cupping. Unfortunately, due to the rise of the Motherhood Industrial Complex, since Motherhood is the ultimate Whitewash, Belly Cupping is never going away. Full Story

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This has to stop

March 14, 2013 14:15:43 Posted at March 14, 2013 14:15:43
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

I really need Jim Carrey to stop with his feet. He keeps walking around with these feet. To promote Burt Wonderstone, I guess? And it’s supposed to be funny... It’s not funny. It’s gross. Maybe it wouldn’t be so gross if there was something caricaturish about them beyond the size. Full Story

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Happy Valentine’s, Bear

February 14, 2013 19:37:28 Posted at February 14, 2013 19:37:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
All Access Photo/ Splash, Lester Cohen/ Mark Davis/ Mark Davis/ Getty

JLO and Slum Bear hit up the Topshop party last night in West Hollywood. The dress isn’t very flattering but it’s better from the back. Hideous shoes though. Did you see earlier this week that Brahim Zaibat was featured in the new VMan? Click here Full Story

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Slum Love + Granny Freeze in the front row

February 11, 2013 15:23:25 Posted at February 11, 2013 15:23:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FREDERIC J. BROWN/ Jason Merritt/ Christopher Polk/ Getty

I don’t care that JLO tried to fight Justin Timberlake’s ego with her leg. I don’t care that she couldn’t resist making the moment about her leg when she was presenting an award. I actually thought “I got the memo” was funny. And besides, oh I’m sorry, I missed the part when we all started expecting JLO to show up somewhere and be humble. Full Story

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Messy Wing-Douches

February 4, 2013 18:07:32 Posted at February 4, 2013 18:07:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet

It's like they were meant to be friends, Mel Gibson and Gerard Butler. Picture it -- both sweaty and red-faced, both spray spit when they talk, both ...leer. Now they get to leer together. Which is a fantasy for some women and for others, like me, is straight up gross. Can you imagine the two of them breathing all over you at the bar, asking if you'd be down with a double motorboat? Me, I probably wouldn't have much to worry about, seeing as I'm unmistakeably Asian and therefore ethnically unworthy of Mel's attraction. Full Story

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Can’t Unsee: Benedict Cumberbatch edition

January 23, 2013 18:02:06 Posted at January 23, 2013 18:02:06
Sarah Posted by Sarah

In a piece of fantastical timing, I had no sooner defended my crush on Benedict Cumberbatch (again), than Dreamworks released the first still from The Fifth Estate, showing Cumberbatch in character as Wikileaks founder Julian Assange. Cannot unsee. Look, if Benedict Cumberbatch is not your flavor, I get it. Full Story

Katy Perry & John Mayer had sex for Christmas

December 27, 2012 19:18:56 Posted at December 27, 2012 19:18:56
Dean Posted by Dean

How’s this for a little coal in your stocking, huh? On Christmas day Katy Perry tweeted this picture of John Mayer wearing a Santa suit, in what look like the final seconds before they screwed under the mistletoe. His face is clearly trying to communicate some sort of boner inspired message and, I think, his hand is actually on his dick. Full Story

By flirting, do you mean spitting?

November 26, 2012 20:15:34 Posted at November 26, 2012 20:15:34
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Splash

I have a problem with portion control and I just ate way too much for lunch and chasing all of it by reading a story about Gerard Butler’s flirting method isn’t helping to keep it down. Spittle is currently promoting his next sh-t movie Playing For Keeps opening December 7th. I don’t understand why people keep casting him. Full Story

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Adrien Brody is in love

November 12, 2012 22:42:44 Posted at November 12, 2012 22:42:44
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Gigi Iorio/ Splash

And when Adrien Brody is in love, it’s like he’s showing you his dick. Check him out at the Rome Film Festival with girlfriend Lara Lieto. Is this a man who’s telling you he’s found the woman of his life, or is this a man telling you how hot sh-t his girlfriend is and that must mean he’s some hot sh-t too? He’s not the first or only dude to have done this, no, of course not. Full Story

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Axl 2012

November 1, 2012 21:19:27 Posted at November 1, 2012 21:19:27
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
INF

So... I used to have an Axl Rose problem. WHAT? I know. I KNOW. Don’t you think I know? He’s a crazy megalomaniac motherf-cker but back then, for those of you who can remember what he used to look like, he was rock hot, ok? And November Rain is a great ballad. And we didn’t have the internet and I only found out later that he chokes women. Full Story

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Gross Hippie Bears

November 1, 2012 15:40:28 Posted at November 1, 2012 15:40:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

JLo Bear and Slum Bear spent Halloween in Germany on tour. So they dressed up as Hippie Bears and shared photos with the fans. As always, JLO Bear is gorgeous. As always, Slum Bear is vile. Especially the shot of him sliding low in his chair, sucking in his stomach like that makes his cock bigger or something. Full Story

Sailor Girl and a Walking Penis

November 1, 2012 15:03:49 Posted at November 1, 2012 15:03:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Bauer-Griffin

Avril Lavigne went out for Halloween without fiancé Chad Kroeger last night. I’m sure he enjoyed her costume at home. That sentence was intended to make you dry heave. Like, she’s agreed to marry Chad Kroeger. If you’re not dry heaving I need you to think about this and get back to me in 10 seconds. Full Story