She’s promoting Melrose Place. Is in New York making the talk show rounds. Photos are attached. Ashlee, as you know, had a baby last year with Pete Wentz. Since landing her new acting gig, she’s been dropping weight steadily. You’ll recall, she did so before allegedly under doctor supervision. Full Story

An extraordinary amount of patience is required to be friends with Jessica Simpson. I am not a patient person. But I am a good friend. And she needs me, so I’m working on it. Porny is frustrating though because progress is always mixed with f-ckery. Before celebrating improvement, you must wait for the other shoe to drop. Full Story

Out of his F-CKING mind. Page Six reports that Joe Simpson is apparently trying to capitalise on the death of Michael Jackson by “pitching a concept album” of MJ songs performed by Ashlee Simpson. Full Story

She’s maintained a very low profile since completing her country tour. But with the confirmation last week that she’d been dumped by her country label, yet another Fail notch on her Fail Bait, it was time to show face and stick her chin up and out. Never let them know you’re down. Which is why Papa Joe dragged Porny’s ass out to Beso the other night for a family dinner. Full Story

Everything is ok. Rumours surfaced earlier this week – something about Pete Wentz being away from home all the time and Ashlee feeling abandoned and they’re breaking up soon, this resulting from Pete alone arriving in Australia. Photo assumption can be dangerous. This is why we must play it only in moderation, see? See? At the MTV Australia awards – look who showed up! It’s Ashlee, with her husband, totally working it for the photographers sending a message loud and clear: we want you to know that we’re still together. Full Story

One has a career in the crapper and is divorced, the other is a new mom, is married, and has a much more promising future as an actor… Ashlee Simpson will be joining Melrose Place. The new Melrose Place. Ugh. There are so many great writers with so many great show pitches, NEW show pitches, and they insist on resurrecting the past. Full Story

This Porny Simpson business… As you know, these photos have made headlines everywhere. Like if the Brange hadn’t come along to show off the family in Tokyo, Porny’s pictures would have been the top story all week long. But no one beats the Brange. For the record, in the original article here posted on Monday, I wrote very clearly that “Jessica Simpson has a lovely body. Full Story

Also in Vegas at Pure, Ashlee Simpson and husband Pete Wentz hosted an affair so lame the most high profile guests were Heidi Montag and that Spencer she may or may not have married. What’s up with all this hosting business? Well, you gotta go where they pay you. So for one night, the new parents left little Bronx at home to earn some cash. Full Story

Am having a hard time with this one…help me decide. So Pete Wentz was on Howard Stern today and he totally gav’er with the personal details re: his sex life with Ashlee Simpson. On the one hand – if you commit to doing Howard Stern (I have a thing for Howard Stern) you have you be prepared to go there. Full Story

Seems like Ashlee Simpson has been pregnant forever but she still doesn’t even look that big to me. How much longer? Are we there yet? This is Ashlee leaving after dinner the other night with an expression that a shrew like me can only interpret as: Ugh. Get this thing out of me. My friend DT is due in January with her second. Full Story

Ashlee Simpson was shopping at Barney’s yesterday and ran into her everything inspiration the new Nicole Richie. She spent the rest of the time following her around in the store taking notes. So what? Not everyone is a leader. And even my Gwynnie has given a style checkmark to Nicole Richie who has just launched a new online charitable gift registry Full Story

And pregnant! And very, very beautiful. This is Ashlee Simpson leaving a friend’s house yesterday in a maxi dress with huge baby boobs and very red hair. What’s up with all you bump obsessed insisting that expectant mothers shouldn’t colour their hair? Don’t tell me that’s her natural hue. Full Story

Because she has to beg for love. Over and over and over again. Three relationships and three times it’s been the same bitter end, to say nothing of the fact that Adam Levine goes around telling people that she showed up to his hotel room wearing nothing but a trenchcoat and a fresh bikini wax underneath. Full Story

Us Weekly is reporting that friends and family of Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have been asked to save the date this Saturday. Translation: Joe Simpson saw the hype that happened when Mariah married Nick and called up Janice Min to kiss her ass and offer her a golden nugget. Full Story