Bedtime reading last night was Vulture’s piece on the 70 Greatest Conspiracy Theories in Pop Culture History. Some of the conspiracy theories are almost more famous than their subjects. Like Elvis still being alive. I mean, God, I wish. Because I was practically an Elvis scholar in early adolescence and one of the things I wish I could un-know and un-picture about Elvis is how he died – on the floor of the bathroom, having been on the toilet before falling over and trying to get help. The people who never believed that Elvis really passed are called “Alivers”. And while the Aliver version of what happened to Elvis is well-known, there are several “truths” that I’d never heard of until I read this story.
Like… JK Rowling didn’t write Harry Potter. She’s an actress hired to play the part of the author. WHAT?! Also, we’ve been looking at a clone of Avril Lavigne since 2003.
Some conspiracy theories are hilarious. Like Stevie Wonder truthers who insist that Stevie can see. And that there’s no such thing as the Beatles. Some conspiracy theories, however, are super confusing to me. Like how much effort has gone into trying to prove that certain artists aren’t responsible for their own work. This is a stupidly simple thing to say but I just don’t understand why you’d bother claiming work that wasn’t your own. What is the satisfaction in that? If the basis of a conspiracy theory is that you have something to gain, what could possibly be gained by letting someone else do it all? What would it feel like to be acknowledged as having directed a film while you’re in the same room with the person who actually directed the film? Wouldn’t that feel like total sh-t?
If you haven’t already, click here for the Vulture roundup of conspiracy theories.
Yours in gossip,
People were joining in on that hashtag before they knew what Amy Schumer did – or if she even did anything except, you know, be Amy Schumer. When I looked up the hashtag on Sunday night, I had to scroll for a while before I realized that a) yes, Amy Schumer did something and b) for the love of sweet baby Blue Ivy, I wish I could un-see that something. Full Story
FilmMagic/ Getty Images
Or, as I like to call it, Jack Reacher: Never Stop Running. Starring in the sequel four years after the original, just plain Jack Reacher, Cruise returns as Reacher, the former military policeman who runs hither and yon and also takes a lot of buses. In one memorable scene in Jack Reacher, Reacher got away on a bus Full Story
Gabriel Olsen/ Getty Images
Wenn, Walter McBride/ J. Kempin/ Getty Images
Nothing about what Lady Gaga wears fazes me anymore (Dlisted)
Brad Pitt’s romantic new poster, although I can’t stop looking at the hairsprayed swirl in his hair (Just Jared)
Tara Reid in her Halloween costume (The Superficial)
Still playing…even though they’re getting in sh-t! (Hollywood Tuna)
Tilda Swinton: a fashion history (Go Fug Yourself)
Chris Hemsworth’s marriage is fine (Jezebel)
FameFlynet, SRPP/ Splash News, Steve Sands/ Raymond Hall/ Getty Images