Now Jane Austen. Jennifer Love Hewitt is adapting Pride and Prejudice for Lifetime. Sure. I’ll wait here while you punch yourself in the face. But you might want to hold some back, because I’m not done, and you’ll probably want to punch yourself in the face again after you read the rest. Full Story

Was it always like this with Jennifer Love Hewitt and she was just better at hiding it before? Or did she grow into being a loser gradually? I watched Party Of Five. Back then I thought she was so interesting and sweet and pretty and engaged to Carson Daly and not pathetic and crazy. This is the downside of accessibility. Full Story

Even if you’ve forgotten, or if you don’t care to know, Jennifer Love Hewitt will always remind you when it’s her birthday. She was at The Ivy yesterday (people still go there?) with some friends celebrating HER BIRTHDAY when, amazingly, the paps were able to shoot her with a sign in her hand announcing that it was HER BIRTHDAY. Full Story

I can’t believe Jennifer Love Hewitt is only 32. She seems... not that young. Desperation can age you. I don’t watch The Bachelor or any of its iterations. Never. So I don’t know who these people are. Apparently JLH does. And she’s been throwing herself at one of them. Some guy called Ben. Full Story

The Screen Actors Guild announced their nominations this morning. There will be no Pitt Porn at the SAGs. Angelina Jolie was not nominated for Best Actress in The Tourist. Michelle Williams was also not nominated for Best Actress for her work in Blue Valentine. Instead, Hilary Swank took the 5th spot for Conviction which, well, Swank has pretty much been ignored by everyone else so far so I guess she has more friends in the Guild. Full Story

Well... it depends how you see it. Where did all this “Oscar buzz” for Justin Timberlake originate anyway? Like I said the other day, whoever it was that was even suggesting it should be embarrassed. He is a joke in The Social Network. Which is why, since the Golden Globe nominations were a joke too, I suppose you could say he was snubbed for one. Full Story

They always say, when they get up there, after their name has been called, that they are so honoured to have been nominated with x, y, and z. These days it’s automatic, and in some cases maybe just lip service. But the sentiment, it’s there. To be included among some of the best, especially if Meryl Streep is involved, it should be an incomparable recognition, and it also says something about your own work – that if yours was good enough to stand next to the others, then it must be really, really great. Full Story

Written by Sarah This week are the industry upfronts where television networks are announcing their lineups for next fall. Yesterday CBS announced they were cancelling seven series, including Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Ghost Whisperer. Full Story

Size 2 Love broke up with Jamie Kennedy like 5 minutes ago. Already her bedazzled vagina has hooked up another companion. His name is John Asher. He is the ex husband of Jenny McCarthy, the father of her son Evan. Supposedly John couldn’t handle Evan’s autism. Jenny doesn’t speak too highly of him. Full Story

Every dumb twat has a book out these days. Is it easy to write a book? It must be. Not for people who can actually write, of course, but definitely easy for people writing for idiots. How else can you explain Tori Spelling’s two bestsellers? Now it’s Size 2 Jennifer Love Hewitt. Because she’s dated, like, everyone. Full Story

Remember when Size 2 celebrated her 30th birthday by reenacting Breakfast at Tiffany’s, casting herself in the legendary role that Audrey Hepburn immortalised? F-CKERY. Full Story

Help me, calm me. Take away the urge to…do something wrong. Punching is wrong. Even when a Size 2 is so. f-cking. annoying. Just received an email from Melissa with the link to this article. Quotes from Jennifer Love Hewitt and her new interview with shape in which she yaps about her diet and her body self love and her boyfriend and then… at the very end… This:"I fall asleep feeling beautiful. Full Story

And a famewhore. And if I’m CBS, and she twisted her ankle and couldn’t work as a result of playing tennis in wedge heels, I’d withhold her pay. This is what it’s like on the Grouse Grind Full Story

Ugh. Size 2 Jennifer Love Hewitt today showing off her new Bentley. “Love” as they call her is the star of a show called Ghost Whisperer that airs on Friday Nights, a modest ratings winner on a night that’s hard to win. For several seasons now. Ghost Whisperer. They watch Ghost Whisperer. Full Story