Worst Oscar Disappointment: Sandy Bullock
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Lainey thinks I'm contrary. I am not. (Lainey: she totally is.) But sometimes if there's an overwhelming opinion that comes at me before I've had a chance to make up my own mind, I will work hard to find validation in the other direction. Just so there's no chance I'm following the crowd. It's why I either see movies early or not at all - I can't deal with the hype.
I felt this way about Sandra Bullock's dress. Everyone somehow saw it a millisecond before I did, and I thought, black, white, blouson, open back, maybe it won't be bad. I know a lot of people hated it merely because of the label that dare not speak its name.
I saw it and, okay, the fit was odd It looked lazy at her ribcage instead of relaxed. I still didn't hate it the way some of you did.
But then you combine it with what she did to her face, and I'm not mad, I'm disappointed. I thought Sandra was different. I thought she knew there were benefits to growing old gracefully, to emulating her friend Meryl Streep.
That's why this article is about "Sandy",not Sandra. "Sandy" seems to me the type to be in the salon every week, trying every new product, getting just a little more bleached and a little more tan each time. “Sandy” worries about keeping up with the Joneses or at least their youth levels. “Sandy” stews over and competes with the other women in the daycare social circle. Which is why she had to go and pull her face up by a few pores. If you don't believe me, by the way, take a look at a shot of her neck. t has not been “rejuvenated”.
She's not perfect, I know, blah blah, lest we forget, but I just thought Sandra Bullock was better than this somehow. You think she's disappointed in herself?
(Lainey counterpart: I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I still think it might be just the Croydon facelift. Some people just have really old looking necks. Like I’ve seen 25 year old necks that look older than Madonna’s. Isn’t that genetic?)