Mimi is still my favourite post of the day but this, this comes very, very close. Barry Manilow received some celebrity guests backstage at his show in Vegas this weekend. Look. It’s Teri Hatcher. And then it’s Victoria Beckham. Side by side, next to those two, Posh looks straight up NATURAL. Full Story

Desperate Housewives is still bringing big ratings. This explains why they’re still invited. But really…it’s not 2004 anymore. People may care about the show, but no one cares about the actors. So far all intents and purposes, it’s like they’re CSI, you know what I mean? This must be why they insist on slapping us in the face on the carpet for fear we won’t notice. Full Story

The good news is… her face doesn’t look so terrifying. Amazing how some people put other people into perspective, right? Constant shots of Madonna and Granny Freeze have numbed us all, no pun intended. The bad news… she’s shopping at the mall. You know those ladies’ stores at the mall? They have names like After Six. Full Story

Seriously…why was Teri Hatcher at Fashion Rocks? Is Teri Hatcher hip? Remotely hip? Please. That face is frightening. And those questionable concrete tits, while not as offensive as Victoria Beckham’s, aren’t exactly appetising either. Sigh… Not everyone is Demi Moore. In all fairness though, have heard from sources on the set of Desperate Housewives that Teri is chilling out. Full Story

Just couldn’t help myself on Wednesday – had to PVR the American Idol Gives Back telethon. Was at times cringing at the irresistible cheese (Celine & Elvis) and at others moved to tears – heaving, sobbing, wailing, particularly when the unflappable Simon Cowell lost his sh-t. And of course for Annie Lennox…had to tune in for Annie Lennox. Full Story

Not that this needs an explanation but whatever. Why pass up an opportunity to slag a bitch? First the bust. She couldn’t fill the bust. So whenever she walked, the top part of her dress would move around, not having any flesh to hold it in place – particularly noticeable when she walked across the stage to present an award, flashing a 3 inch gap between her gown and her chest. Full Story

Do I need to remind you of the eyesores she’s worn before? Here…let me remind you. But still…in the past… I have refused to cut Patricia Arquette. Because in spite of the example set by other prime time players on television, Patricia has avoided the Teri Hatcher habit of squeezing the life out of her face and the other endless examples of emaciated celebrity garishly illustrated by her peers. Full Story

Hands down, without a doubt, the two biggest bitches at Sundance – Teri Hatcher and Kristen Bell aka Veronica Mars. First Teri – saw her hangin’ off her man (ex boyfriend of Eva Longoria) arriving at the Village at the Lift where the Fred Segal suite was open for business. Pappies were flashing, she seemed smug and sated about finally finding herself a fool willing to date her, and at the same time desperately aware of the absurdity of the situation – he is, after all, a decent looking man with prospects. Full Story

Clearly taking a page from the Tom Cruise Book of Fag Camouflage. Step 1 - pretend you like fast cars: But have you ever seen a man LESS suited to high octane, high testosterone race car driving than Ryan Seacrest? Check out Seacrest in all his vain ass glory this weekend at the Coca Cola 600. Aside from the fact that Teri Hatcher pretty much outed him on Letterman 2 weeks ago, is there anyone out there who still thinks this homo gay is not a homo gay? Full Story

In the immortal words of my former eTalk producer and close friend Duana... SIT DOWN Eva Longoria. The term SIT DOWN - with much emphasis on the DOWN - refers to someone whose famewhoring is spinning wildly out of control, so much so that they speak at inappropriate times, they shove themselves in front of the camera at inappropriate moments, and like Teri Hatcher who originally inspired the expression during the Golden Globes in January, should really just "SIT DOWN and SHUT THE F*C K UP. Full Story

So Teri"s coming out with a book. And to publicise the book, she goes on Oprah. While she"s on Oprah, she discusses her history of abuse, she discusses how it affected her marriage, she was open and honest, and I dare say - I actually liked her. But then came the big mistake. Because just when you thought it was a well executed, image boosting appearance, out comes the Ryan Seacrest question. Full Story

Look, I was all over leather pants… IN 1998!!! But in LA??? In the middle of April? For dinner??? Someone, anyone…find this woman a boyfriend. Her desperation and her 40 year old libido are wreaking havoc on my eyes. I"m telling you… the poor thing is one date with Ryan Seacrest away from Teri Hatcher. Full Story

This weekend at the GLAAD awards. So is there any wonder why the entire smutting universe thinks Ryan Seacrest is gay? What self respecting straight man would hit this? Teri Hatcher is an instant erection killer. And at this rate, the wretched hag is going to be single for life. Poor thing. Now I feel sorry for her. Full Story