As mentioned in the open, I’ve not seen every magazine cover this week but no doubt, Jennifer Aniston will likely be on a few of them, including the new issue of US Weekly. Interestingly enough, while US offers details about Justin Theroux’s proposal and what their baby plans are (as IF), the Brange, of course, also makes an appearance and US is reporting exclusively that the wedding is indeed happening. Full Story

It's not just that we won't release them all from the Eternal Triangle, it's that they themselves can't get over it either. On the weekend that Brange was rumoured to marry in France - didn't happen - Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux announced their engagement. Coincidence or conspiracy? Timing, of course, as is the case, always, with Jen vs Brad and Angelina, is paramount. Full Story

As discussed yesterday - click here for a refresher - certain French media outlets are all over the Brange chateau in the South of France for a possible wedding there this weekend. Again, as also discussed yesterday, Euro gossips are about as reliable as . Full Story

French outlets are reporting that Brange will marry at Miraval on Saturday which also happens to be Brad’s parents’ 50th anniversary. There has been speculation around this date for months, ever since they announced their engagement. Now Paris Match Full Story

Do they draw straws? What is the child selection process for a Brange one-parent trip? I’m sure in this case it’s something boring. Like Maddox is off at camp, or maybe with dad and grandma Pitt for a racial sensitivity photo opportunity, and the twins are still too young to come along for this one. Full Story

Many of you are young parents. Do you ever worry about this? Because we can all safely say that we’ve been embarrassed by our parents, right? When will it be your turn to embarrass your kids? What will you do? Will you write to a newspaper to say that you think gay people should be denied the right to marry and women the right to make decisions about their own bodies? This is what happened to Brad Pitt last week. Full Story

The Jolie’s staff looks to have a green eye staring out from its head. Does it fire laser beams? Any character with horns growing out her head has to walk around with a staff. It would be irresponsible not to. Maybe one day nerds will start writing horny fan fiction about the time Maleficent and Galdalf f-cked each other in a cave. Full Story

Angelina Jolie’s Maleficent can apparently fly. Here she is on set today in England suspended against a green screen. Am now very interested to see what they do with this in post and how real it will look when they’re done. Will it actually seem like the Jolie is airborne outside? Last night at SMUT there was a question about the Jolie’s thinness and whether or not it has anything to do with heroin. Full Story

For some reason, seeing the Jolie in costume as Maleficent in England today surrounded by bulls (I think they’re bulls but if they’re not I apologise - I am terrible at identifying animals) reminded me of True Blood Season 2 and that crazy ass maenad Maryanne. Wasn’t she really horny for a divine bull or something? God I hated that storyline so much. Full Story

Disney just sent out a press release this morning announcing that production on Maleficent began on June 13 with Angelina Jolie in the title role. Interestingly enough, for a big ass deal like this, the film’s director is an amateur. Robert Stromberg has won 2 Oscars for production design (Avatar, Alice In Wonderland), but this is his first time running the show. Full Story

Page Six reports that Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux are collaborating on a short film instead of a baby. They’re supposedly satirising the gossip industry’s fixation on their relationship - one minute she’s pregnant, the next they’ve broken up. Full Story

As we all know by now, the Jolie wasn’t with Brad Pitt at the Killing Them Softly premiere last night. We’ll get to that in a minute. Without Angelina, Brad stayed close to his team, preferring to pose with them in a group instead of alone. Not that he blended in...He was definitely the leader. They moved when he moved. Full Story

With a little Sonny Crockett, right? I know some of you aren’t feeling it. Me, I’d be so much more into it... but for that gold chain around his right wrist. If not for that gold chain, I’m buying. It’s probably the white belt. I am predisposed to liking a white belt on a man; I think it reminds me of golf. Full Story

Here are all 8 Branges on a speedboat in the Galapagos Islands. As you can see, the Jolie prefers the Alexis Carringston style of holiday dress. God when you have that many of them there’s a lot of sh-t to carry: bags, blankets, teddy bears. Check out little Knox’s shoe game. There’s your Noblesse Casual Full Story