Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Carpets & Candids: Keira’s green tulle

November 1, 2016 14:38:38 Posted at November 1, 2016 14:38:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Mark Milan/ David M. Benett/ Fred Duval/ Getty Images

Sad to say I don’t like this dress, not at all. And I like so much of what Keira Knightley wears. But the tulle looks weird around the neck and the chest. And, UGH, it’s sheer on purpose so you can see the shorter beige slip underneath and the black pumps are doing nothing for any of the colours. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Zoe’s snakes

October 31, 2016 20:34:38 Posted at October 31, 2016 20:34:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

A good example of the idea being better than the execution. I like the snakes and the other images embroidered onto this dress. But the dress itself looks sloppy, the material is lumping and bulging, and for Gucci, it doesn’t feel high end, it feels almost like an amateur submission. And, in these times, kinda Halloween costumey, like what you’d find in a party shoppe under “princess” dress. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Brie’s bad hair

October 31, 2016 14:00:24 Posted at October 31, 2016 14:00:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

I f-cking hate the seafoam. It’s a terrible colour. Like, at this point, it’s become offensive to me that people show up in places thinking seafoam belongs on a red carpet. But what’s worse here than the seafoam is Brie Larson’s hair. Few people can pull off this hair. Alexa Chung? Sure. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Jessica’s fur and bells

October 25, 2016 16:45:57 Posted at October 25, 2016 16:45:57
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Jackson Lee/ Splash News

Jessica Simpson dressed like this to go shopping at Barneys. I would have refused to sell her anything, tell her to go back to wherever she founds these pants. These pants. They remind me of Madonna, the Blond Ambition tour, and Holiday. That tour. God, that tour. One of the best tours of all time. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Halle’s open blouse

October 14, 2016 16:14:24 Posted at October 14, 2016 16:14:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

I mean, she’s Halle Berry so she looks incredible. But… can I say I’m kinda bored of her style? The exposed bra, the pants cut tight on the thigh and wider at the ankle… It’s kind of dated. Like Jennifer Aniston probably wore this exact same outfit 10 years ago. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Kate’s blush satin pants

October 14, 2016 15:05:20 Posted at October 14, 2016 15:05:20
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Donato Sardella/ Jon Kopaloff/ Getty Images

This is a heinous outfit. And, my God, these are heinous pants. The all-over blush is a problem. But it’s the blush satin pants that are so objectionable to me I’m actually angry. There is no excuse for this unless you are Mariah Carey and about to get in a bathtub and ruin the outfit. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Tori’s behind dress

July 28, 2016 15:16:13 Posted at July 28, 2016 15:16:13
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, FameFlynet

I first saw this dress from behind. And was interested. It’s the cap sleeve. I’ll always care about a cap sleeve. But then she turned around and it’s a mess. How could one dress have such a different personality in the back than it does in the front. It’s like two entirely different species! Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: January’s stripes and flowers

July 25, 2016 14:48:01 Posted at July 25, 2016 14:48:01
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Dave Mangels/ Getty Images

I thought, at first, this was a romper. And if it were a romper, I’d say she should have gone a size up. People have an aversion to wearing anything above their true size. And it often gets in the way of good style. I repeat: what happened to January Jones’s style?! Romper or not, these shorts could use an extra inch in length. Full Article

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Carpets & Candids: Heidi’s cheap yellow Cannes

May 20, 2016 16:27:22 Posted at May 20, 2016 16:27:22
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, FameFlynet

Let’s go back to what Karl Lagerfeld once said about Heidi Klum: “She was never in Paris. We don’t know her.” Which means she was never runway, never couture. And, well, by “supermodel” standards, he’s right. Because what the f-ck is this dress?  Full Article

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