The consciously uncoupled ring

April 9, 2014 13:43:43 Posted at April 9, 2014 13:43:43
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Keystone

Gwyneth Paltrow posted a photo to social media yesterday to mark her son’s birthday with the message:

Moses Bruce Paltrow Martin turns 8 today. We love you! pic.twitter.com/O7d1a7Hwul

I’m guessing Moses is not on Twitter or Instagram yet. So… who is this for? Is it for him in a few years? Like will he go back through the archives and look at it when he turns 12? Will she print it off for him – do people print things off anymore? – and frame it for his bedroom? G’s not the only one who does this. Civilians do it all the time. “Happy Birthday to my baby who turns 1 (or 3 or 5) today!” On Facebook, right? Can the baby check Facebook?

No but it’s about shaaaaaaaaaring.

OK but it’s also – a little – about attention, isn’t it?

The attention G is getting over this photo is about the ring. Because in sharing the image, she’s showing you that she’s still wearing one. No, we don’t know when this picture was taken. But she was papped leaving her LA home on Sunday (see! I knew that Exumas photo yesterday was a diversion!). The quality of these images isn’t great but you can see her in the front seat and, very clearly, there’s a ring on that finger.

Wedding ring?

Or separation ring?

Wouldn’t it be AMAZING if she invents that too? Since the conscious uncoupling, we’ve been introduced to the idea of a “breakup-moon” because she and Chris Martin were in the Bahamas together when the announcement was made.

And now…now if she gives us a “breakup ring”, you might actually throw yourself off the balcony, won’t you?

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