George Clooney is single, OK?
George Clooney said hello to Katie Holmes at a premiere. So then everyone said they might be hooking up. Then he went to dinner with an attractive lawyer. And we speculated that she might be the Next. But US Weekly claims he and Monika Jakisic are having sleepovers. Basically, we all want George to have a very busy dick. And he doesn’t want us to think his dick is so busy. I think?
George and his rep released a statement to PEOPLE yesterday about all his rumoured dealings.
"Three different stories in three weeks. I should be an athlete. But, no of course, it's all made up."
I love how he can’t resist making it a little dirty even in a denial. Right? He could simply say – no it’s all made up, I’m not dating anyone. But instead he gets us thinking about his stamina and that’s why he’s George Clooney. Even when it’s not true, he makes it fun.
Same goes for his publicist. Even the denials are colourful:
"George wants this Monika crap to stop. He wants Katie to get a break, and he wants Amal to be able to prosecute cases without being hassled because she had one dinner with George and four others … I even asked George if these [rumors] were true and he said he never comments on his private life, but in the interest of stopping the harassment of all three of these women, he felt he should."
You know what makes me laugh? Do you think these three women would ever characterise being linked to George Clooney as “harassment”?