Smutty Surgery Articles

Better for her, worse for him?

April 7, 2014 19:19:45 Posted at April 7, 2014 19:19:45
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, KHAPGG/ STARPICZ/ Splash

Nicole Kidman is currently in Australia shooting a movie called Strangeland. This is why she couldn’t attend the ACM Awards with Keith Urban. As you can see, Gran’s gone brown. And it works for her. Because it softens her face. It mutes the enhancements. There’s something about blonde on her that highlights the tight and the fill, you know? Over in Vegas though, where Keith was winning awards and performing, it’s a different story. Full Story

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Katy Perry’s Beatles cape

January 28, 2014 20:33:28 Posted at January 28, 2014 20:33:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Kevin Winter/ Larry Busacca/ Frazer Harrison/ Getty

You know what? I like this outfit way more than her Grammys dress – the one that looked like it was fashioned from an Ikea duvet cover, click here for a refresher. This is Katy Perry at the Grammys Beatles tribute last night. It looks like she performed. Full Story

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Madonna cane and grills

January 27, 2014 15:31:25 Posted at January 27, 2014 15:31:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

The best part of Madonna’s appearance at the Grammys last night was her matching mom and son red carpet ensemble with David Banda. He’s a badass poser. Who, apparently, is waiting to get his own grill, because his mother promised him one but first they have to go to the dentist and get a mold. Full Story

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Keith Urban’s Grammy face

January 27, 2014 14:51:10 Posted at January 27, 2014 14:51:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jason Merritt/ Getty

Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman did not attend the Grammys last night. But she was there in spirit…all over her husband’s face, holy sh-t. To me it looks like he completely redesigned his bone structure – full cheeks and not a line anywhere. I guess it’s not a new thing but since he’s always with Gran, we’re too busy looking at her unnatural perfection instead of noticing that the same has been happening to him. Full Story

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Meg & John in Italy

June 21, 2013 17:35:04 Posted at June 21, 2013 17:35:04
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet, Jose Perez/ Splash, Valerio Pennicino/ Getty

Meg Ryan was honoured in Italy at the Taormina Film Festival. Man, I really don’t know about those shoes. I don’t understand those shoes, though I suspect you’re not looking at the shoes because you’re looking at something else. Fair enough. I don’t understand the thing you’re looking at either. Full Story

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Rob Lowe’s Dr Plastic

May 28, 2013 15:54:49 Posted at May 28, 2013 15:54:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
FameFlynet

Did you watch Behind The Candelabra? I’m going to keep harassing you about this. Anyway, Rob Lowe, one of Hollywood’s most well-aged faces (is this irony? I never know), played Liberace’s plastic surgeon Dr Startz. Dr Startz did a lot of rich faces back then. Lowe’s performance was hilarious if not sliiiiiightly extra. Full Story

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As IF, Granny Freeze

February 1, 2013 21:20:35 Posted at February 1, 2013 21:20:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jen Lowery/ Splash

I wrote last week that I prefer the Joan Rivers way of face-jacking which is that she does it and she doesn’t lie about it. Ashley Judd wrote a piece with big words lecturing everyone last year after the Internet went crazy about what she called, at the time, a reaction to “steroid medication” due to illness. Full Story

Granny humps for Matt Damon

January 25, 2013 20:41:18 Posted at January 25, 2013 20:41:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

Did you see Jimmy Kimmel Sucks hosted by Matt Damon last night? I was Nyquiled so I only watched this morning, in bits and pieces because the entire show is geo-blocked and YouTube has the individual segments spliced up. Heads up Americans, before you send a recommendation, Hulu is geo-blocked too. Full Story

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Blush Dresses at the Globes: Amy Adams and Megan Fox

January 14, 2013 17:32:35 Posted at January 14, 2013 17:32:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Jason Merritt/ Kevin Winter/ ROBYN BECK/ Getty

Is that what you call it? Blush? So much of it. Too much of it. And strapless. And all of a similar shape. Let’s start with Amy Adams who...I mean Duana and I hated it the minute we saw it. Look at the bottom. It’s sh-tting tulle. The dress is SH-ITTING tulle. Here it comes, you ready? It’s sh-tting tulle because. Full Story

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Post-Natal Pretend Face

December 3, 2012 20:44:08 Posted at December 3, 2012 20:44:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Vera Anderson/Getty

Megan Fox is promoting This Is 40. She was at a press conference in Beverly Hills the other day, one of her first official work engagements since having her baby, which, I don’t remember his name right now and can’t be bothered to Google but my point is that I can remember what Gwyneth Paltrow wore 12 years ago to a particular premiere and it’s just interesting the details your brain will hold on to. Full Story

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See Granny as Grace

October 9, 2012 18:34:30 Posted at October 9, 2012 18:34:30
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Bauer, FameFlynet

I believe these are the first shots of Nicole Kidman on set in Monaco as Grace Kelly. If this is a wig, it’s a very good one. Or did she take her extensions out? Princess Grace’s title, like that of her daughter-in-law Charlene, was Her Serene Highness. And Granny Freeze certainly looks serene here. Full Story

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The judge’s wife has three lips

September 5, 2012 18:19:37 Posted at September 5, 2012 18:19:37
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Al Bello/Getty

TMZ just reported that Mariah Carey’s American Idol is supposed to start auditioning in two weeks and so far she’s the only judge. Yeah? What’s the problem? TMZ says the problem is that producers are hoping for 4 judges; two of them - Nicki Minaj and Keith Urban - are still negotiating their deals and they’ve no ideas for the final person on the panel. Full Story

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Granny at the Games

July 30, 2012 14:36:10 Posted at July 30, 2012 14:36:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Dave M. Benett/Mike Marsland/Getty

This is Nicole Kidman’s first public appearance since Katie Holmes broke up with the Church Of Scientology to become Courage Mom, superhero, saving Suri from a life of auditing and being groomed to marry David Miscavige, thus thrusting Nicole’s post-Cruise parenting back into the spotlight. Full Story

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Madonna & Michelle Pfeiffer

June 18, 2012 20:54:08 Posted at June 18, 2012 20:54:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Fame/Flynet, New Press Photo/Splash

Are the same age. I guess there are many different ways of doing it... Here’s Michelle Pfeiffer this weekend at the premiere of People Like Us. She looks lovely. She doesn’t look like she’s fighting it. Do you remember her in Tequila Sunrise? This is my favourite Mel Gibson movie. Full Story

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