As IF Articles

Vogue slums with JLo

March 16, 2012 17:02:05 Posted at March 16, 2012 17:02:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
SPW / Splash News

She’s on the cover of the April issue looking really good, but I also wonder why they chose to go with studio shots as opposed to a more interesting visual. Where Jennifer Lopez is concerned, there’s always a story behind the shot.The entire article has been posted on the Vogue website; it’s a total dick suck. Full Story

Aloof & Sister at the Oscars

February 27, 2012 14:44:46 Posted at February 27, 2012 14:44:46
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Michael Buckner/JOE KLAMAR/Ethan Miller/Getty

Let me start with the dress...which I quite liked. It’s Givenchy. The back is awesome. And so well suited to her aesthetic. I just think she couldn’t hold it up, you know? Like carry it properly. Her body has a small part to do with that, sure, but mostly it’s the oh-please-I’d-rather-be-developing-a-character-with-David-Fincher body language that she’s wearing with it that undermines the creation. Full Story

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Fontrum by Kate Bosworth

February 17, 2012 20:15:54 Posted at February 17, 2012 20:15:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I learned this week that Kate Bosworth has a Twitter. Thanks WA! Or maybe that’s no thanks. Because when I went to see what she tweets about, it grossed me out.Kate’s boyfriend Michael Polish is on Twitter too. And he posted this photo below with the caption: JUST LIKE HEAVEN. Full Story

The Power of Clinging

November 23, 2011 21:08:29 Posted at November 23, 2011 21:08:29
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Bauer

Hilarious article was posted on Us Weekly’s website today. Title: Jessica Biel has the power in Justin Timberlake relationshipAccording to a source - obviously deserving of an eyeroll - Jessica has “the power” because she took him back AFTER HE CHEATED ON HER. Full Story

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30 pounds of As IF

November 9, 2011 14:38:13 Posted at November 9, 2011 14:38:13
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Mimi is the new spokesperson for Jenny Craig! And there’s been an unveiling!As you can imagine, I have watched the unveiling, like, at least a dozen times. I’ve also, for your viewing pleasure, screen capped many of the best parts. Of her body. That are obscured and shadowed and angled and, um, maybe even retouched, all amounting to what she claims is a 30 pound weight loss since she started the Jenny program on July 22 which has resulted in her now sitting at a very petite size 4 or 6. Full Story

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As IF Ashley Greene

October 18, 2011 18:59:45 Posted at October 18, 2011 18:59:45
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There’s a new Twilight movie coming out in a month. Just today I received an email from a friend about it (Relax, I’m not outing you, you can read the rest of the article without panicking) and she was wondering if she should go to see it at one of those theatres that will play all 3 preceding movies before the new one. Full Story

Shirtless Guy

October 7, 2011 16:44:33 Posted at October 7, 2011 16:44:33
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

Big Thanksgiving bonus for all you Coldplay fans who are hot for Guy Berryman. Check him out, with his shirt off, after the band’s show in Cape Town earlier this week. He is beautiful, non? Remember when Lindsay Lohan tried to make us think she was his girlfriend? Click here Full Story

The GMD could totally do Nessun Dorma

July 26, 2011 07:49:56 Posted at July 26, 2011 07:49:56
Lainey Posted by Lainey

As we all know, the GMD got really into the singing for Rock of Ages. And they keep trying to tell us that he can actually sing for real. That we will be amazed by his vocal abilities. That his voice will complete you. Was this part of the contract? Because one after another they’re trotting them out to deliver these lines, the same lines, so if it’s not overly obvious then, um, it must be true??? According to his Rock of Ages co-star Malin Ackerman: "You will be shocked. Full Story

Enough to feed the family

July 20, 2011 14:08:56 Posted at July 20, 2011 14:08:56
Lainey Posted by Lainey

People watch me eat like it’s something grotesque. I can pack away the food. When we were in Barbados, I would clean off my producer Heather’s dinners every night. And our friend Tiffany’s. After my own meal. Portion Control is an expression I would gladly take a sh-t on. So... Here’s David Beckham, again with a new Facebook photo Full Story

Posh sells books

July 19, 2011 13:59:18 Posted at July 19, 2011 13:59:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Several of you have emailed me about this today: sales of Harper Lee’s To Kill A Mockingbird have increased 123% on Amazon UK; it now occupies 38th spot on the bestseller list. The Beckham Bump. Does she know? OF COURSE she knows. As IF she hasn’t been googling Harper Seven Beckham Victoria Beckham since she gave birth. Full Story

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Photo shoots for Harper Seven

July 18, 2011 12:42:38 Posted at July 18, 2011 12:42:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey

She’s just a week old but already Harper Seven, thanks to her parents, is being well trained in the art of photo famewhoring... “candidly”, of course. Photos of Harper being cradled by both her mother and her father have been posted on David Beckham’s Facebook Full Story

One year of As IF-ing

July 15, 2011 13:32:03 Posted at July 15, 2011 13:32:03
Lainey Posted by Lainey

“Harper was a name that we’ve loved for a long time, you know, for a couple of reasons. One of the reasons is, um, Harper’s an old English name which we loved, and one of the other reasons, Victoria’s favourite book is To Kill a Mockingbird and the author was Harper Lee. Ah, and it’s a very strong, passionate book so that’s where Harper came from. Full Story

Another monumental As IF

July 8, 2011 07:31:00 Posted at July 8, 2011 07:31:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Yesterday’s As IF moment came to us courtesy Victoria Beckham or, rather, David Beckham who claimed his wife Posh didn’t know that he was iPhoning her pregnantly candid. Click here for a refresher. Today’s As IF is thanks to Megan Fox who took to her Facebook page in a post titled "THINGS YOU CAN'T DO WITH YOUR FACE WHEN YOU HAVE BOTOX" to prove she’s never had Botox by posting these attached photos of herself scrunching up her forehead like that sh-t is all natural. Full Story

The Biggest As IF in the world

July 7, 2011 12:28:00 Posted at July 7, 2011 12:28:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

David Beckham just posted this photo on his Facebook page: Took this pic of Victoria while she wasn't looking. She looks amazing, so close now to the baby being born!Um, as IF she wasn’t looking. As IF they didn’t try this at least 15 times, and he showed her every time, and she readjusted even more times, until they got it right. Full Story