Ashton Kutcher Gossip

Ashton Kutcher gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

The Daily Quiveration: Ashton Kutcher

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 23, 2006 12:00:00 August 23, 2006 12:00:00

When he"s clean shaven, when he"s not rockin" a patchy beard, I am all over it. Especially since I"ve become a big supporter of his love, his marriage, his devotion to Demi, however long it might last. My problem with Ashton though is the sorry attempt at facial hair. Have you seen Team America World Police? We were playing poker last week and had it on in the background. Full Story

Movie Trailer #1: Ashton Kutcher stirs my loins

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 3, 2006 12:00:00 July 3, 2006 12:00:00

I don"t care for Kevin Costner. If I wanted to worship an arrogant, massage perv, chronic philanderer - I"m more than happy to focus on Ryan Phillippe. But even though the Postman puts me into a disinterested coma on the best of days, I probably will see The Guardian only for Ashton Kutcher. Because if the trailer is any indication, Mr Moore delivers a loin quiveringly explosive performance that is easy on the eyes, hard on the thighs, and blessedly short on facial pubes - a look he"s been inexplicably rocking for reasons unbeknownst to anyone but his preternaturally preserved wife. Full Story

Justin pouts

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 23, 2006 12:00:00 April 23, 2006 12:00:00

Oh gwumpy wumpy little baby JT. Big superstar doesn"t appreciate being followed by the pappies. Big superstar driving a super expensive BMW hates the attention. Big superstar with several other high end cars and lives in a gazillion dollar mansion supported by millions of fans with an appetite for candid photos gets all poo poo sulky if you don"t let him enjoy his high glam life in private. Full Story

The Daily Ugly: Ashton Kutcher

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 20, 2006 12:00:00 April 20, 2006 12:00:00

Two months ago I was singing his hot praises. Unfortunately, Ashton has now fallen back into the sh*tter. Because on Mr. Moore, hirsute is horrid. And hirsute has earned him the distinction of being named the Daily Ugly not once but twice. I don"t know why anyone would want to make a hairy face and look like Dominic Monaghan. Full Story

Amanda Peet needs help

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 18, 2006 12:00:00 April 18, 2006 12:00:00

I like Amanda Peet. I saw her a little while ago in some movie with Ashton Kutcher and I thought she was adorable. Having said that, I also think she needs a fashion lobotomy. Here she is last night at some event in NYC. Here she is at previous events looking like - to quote Stanford Blatch - fashion roadkill. Full Story

Loin quiveration for Ashton Kutcher

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 21, 2006 12:00:00 February 21, 2006 12:00:00

I’ve never found Ashton Kutcher all that worthy of panty rippage. Don’t get me wrong – he’s never been hideous but the outside package just couldn’t overcome the sophomore antics or the surfer stoner persona. Things only got worse when he and Demi hooked it up. For a while, like many of you, I could not understand this relationship. Full Story

Cameron Crowe"s big mistake

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 12, 2006 12:00:00 February 12, 2006 12:00:00

One of the great things about taking time off is that you get to catch up on DVDs. There are movies that I refuse to pay for. And yet these are the same movies I do not object to watching at home. Elizabethtown is one of those movies. Given Cameron Crowe"s reputation, given the fact that he has considerable influence in Hollywood, I was surprised to see it tank at the box office. Full Story