Assy Hair Articles

Celebrity hair disasters, bad cuts, and out-dated styles.

Gran’s big hair

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 27, 2012 16:30:51 January 27, 2012 16:30:51
Photos:
Oliver S Wolf/Splash

Nicole Kidman went out for lunch in LA yesterday looking like a lady of leisure on a housewife show. That...is a lot of volume. Nicole’s next release won’t happen until May on HBO for Hemingway & Gellhorn. No doubt, as is often the case when movie stars make tv series, she’ll be nominated for an Emmy and then a Globe next year. Full Story

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Worst of 2011: Elisabeth Moss’s Emmy hair

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 9, 2011 18:26:07 December 9, 2011 18:26:07
Photos:
Wenn, Bauer

If you can believe it, Katherine Heigl’s wasn’t the worst hair of the year. Almost...But then Elisabeth Moss took the Heigl and amplified the sh-tness of it. And this is what she gave us. Why don’t you take a minute, let the horror wash over you... SHE IS ONLY 29 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!There is no pleasure in Moss’s hair failings. Full Story

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My Princess doesn’t wear hair tape

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 27, 2011 14:40:50 October 27, 2011 14:40:50
Photos:
Getty Images

Prince Charles was supposed to attend the “In Kind Direct” charity event yesterday at Clarence House. He couldn’t make it however because he had to fly to Riyadh to pay his respects following the death of the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia. Princess Catherine was waiting in the bullpen. (Are you people watching the World Series? It’s been a GREAT World Series. Full Story

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Justin didn’t fix the shoe problem

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 17, 2011 17:15:23 October 17, 2011 17:15:23
Photos:
Kevin Winter/Eric Charbonneau/Getty

Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux attended the American CInematheque even in honour of Robert Downey Jr on Friday in Beverly Hills. I like him in a black on black suit. It’s too bad he couldn’t help her with her shoe problem. Look at her shoes. Bash your head against your desk. WHY does this keep happening? In other Jennifer Aniston news, Jacek and I stayed in on Friday night after getting home from a 10 day trip to Toronto and Montreal. Full Story

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Worst Emmy Hair: Elisabeth Moss

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 19, 2011 09:08:02 September 19, 2011 09:08:02

Elisabeth Moss was born in 1982. She’s only 29 years old. She’s YOUNGER THAN BRITNEY SPEARS. Now that this has been thrown in your face, it makes her hair last night even more offensive, right? How does a 29 year old girl show up at the Emmys with Allison Janney’s 1960s old lady helmet from The Help? This is the kind of sh-t that makes me so angry. Full Story

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Blake’s Mole & Leighton’s fringe

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 30, 2011 13:05:51 June 30, 2011 13:05:51

Leighton Meester was photographed yesterday in New York leaving the Ritz Hotel promoting her new movie Monte Carlo wearing a new(ish?) fringe. HATE it. Love everything else – the dress, shoes, all of it – but the fringe...cheapens it, non? I know you think I’m biased about a fringe, and I am, but this girl is fresh and beautiful and young and now, now she looks hard and low classy. Full Story

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Photo Assumption: Heigl’s Husband

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2011 08:02:26 May 26, 2011 08:02:26

It’s time to make up baseless assumptions by studying a series of photographs. Let’s play Photo Assumption on Katherine Heigl’s husband’s side-face while out for lunch yesterday with her and her mother. Horror, right? Total HORROR. Imagine – as if Katherine’s goddamn hair isn’t bad enough, it actually MATCHES her mom’s… !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT MATCHES HER MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is happening here? HOW is it being allowed to happen? I know I’ve asked this before. Full Story

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Not his best day

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 22, 2011 10:33:05 April 22, 2011 10:33:05

The Bang Bang Club screened at the Tribeca Film Festival today. Malin Ackerman, Ryan Phillippe, and Taylor Kitsch were all present. I don’t know what’s happening with Taylor’s hair but it’s hurting me, like actual physical pain. Obviously not his best showing. Having said that, yay for him hanging out with DeNiro on red carpets! But back to the hair… Is it long in the back or short? Is it in a ponytail? Is that a combover? Why am I including the word COMBOVER in an article about Taylor Kitsch????????????? The world hates me. Full Story

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Better in a bad situation

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 7, 2011 09:43:28 April 7, 2011 09:43:28

We’ve been sh-tting on Katherine Heigl’s hair situation for a while now. Forget about how you feel about her on a bitch level, from a completely objective point of view, that mess is a mess. However… A mess is a sliding scale. And yesterday, as she was photographed with her husband, leaving to head to the Ellen show, the mess, well, I guess it could have been worse. Full Story

Why can’t you get your hair right?!?!?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 14, 2011 07:53:00 March 14, 2011 07:53:00

I mean… I just shouted out in anger in the middle of the living room at 12:30am at Duana’s on Saturday night/Sunday morning while writing this because F-CK, why can’t Katherine Heigl ever get her goddamn hair right?!?!? She’s 32. She’s not 62. She’s tall and pretty, with the kind of good looks that don’t necessarily intimidate, belying the fact that she’s actually a mouthy ungrateful bitch. Full Story

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Worst Oscar Hair: Reese Witherspoon

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 28, 2011 08:16:00 February 28, 2011 08:16:00

Jesus. Who made this call? The only, only, only positive here are the earrings. Everything else is an Elle Woods homage to Julia Roberts. But it’s the hair that’s really the crime here. The dress is for a hostess but it’s the hair that really fills me with rage. Obviously the homemaker aspect of it is offensive in itself, but also… the fact that it requires a hairpiece to pull off, one of those tacky ass accessories you can order off the tv – WHY is this happening to Reese Witherspoon? She doesn’t usually f-ck it up so badly. Full Story

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