Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Mimi vs Angie

October 6, 2008 14:26:17 Posted at October 6, 2008 14:26:17
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Saturday night in New York, Angelina wore Versace to premiere The Changeling. Saturday night in Vegas, Mariah Carey wore the same Versace to host a party. One dress, two broads, and both in Spanx….who wins? Oh Mimi. You never want to go head to head against the Jolaire.* Mimi probably went Hello Kitty on her stylist’s ass. Full Story

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Ashley’s assy dress

October 4, 2008 13:24:00 Posted at October 4, 2008 13:24:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Ashley Judd attended the World Youth AIDS gala last night wearing this. What is that? Why is that? Why would anyone wear that? Ashley’s career has slowed down dramatically the last few years since she married – perhaps by choice but also by reality. Head to head among her peers like Julianne Moore or Laura Linney, Naomi Watts, Salma Hayek, Halle Berry, Kate Winslet, Cate Blanchett, my Gwyneth, Renee Zellweger (and the list goes on and on and on) the truth is how would Ashley Judd ever out-act any of those ladies just mentioned? Her next feature is Tooth Fairy with The Rock…B List At Best, right? And then there was that curious little trip to rehab for emotional problems. Full Story

Taupe Maternity

October 3, 2008 08:58:54 Posted at October 3, 2008 08:58:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sorry I’m a bit slow today. Been distracted reading this at Maclean’s. F*cking hilarious. Anyway… So I guess we’ve been spoiled a little. With all these celebrities getting pregnant and capitalising on their pregnancies as a boost to their careers via the paparazzi, we’ve been treated almost on a daily basis to super cute maternity wear. Full Story

What can she do?

October 1, 2008 14:30:19 Posted at October 1, 2008 14:30:19
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Porny can’t act. Porny can’t dress. Porny can’t think. Porny can’t make good decisions. And now… Porny can’t sing. Call me Cruise but I always thought she could sing. At the very least, I thought she could do that. Her old songs may have sucked and her technique may have been gymnastic vocals at its worst, but I naively believed that the title “Jessica Simpson, singer”, was not a fallacy. Full Story

Maybe not with red lips

September 29, 2008 13:56:06 Posted at September 29, 2008 13:56:06
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Just wrote last week about Jennifer Lopez’s open-mouth pose and how it makes my life. Should that be qualified by saying but maybe not with red lips? JLo was at Macy’s today – what’s with Macy’s lately!? – to launch her new fragrance “Deseo For Men”. You’ll note the dude she uses in the ad with her is not her own husband. Full Story

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Matching…and Presenting!

September 29, 2008 07:33:07 Posted at September 29, 2008 07:33:07
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Seriously… Why can’t they just hold hands? Just once? The GMD took his Robo out for dinner last night and as you can see, as usual, he had to present her to the paps, guiding her like a delicate lady child to and from the restaurant. You will note they coordinated fabrics before heading out. Full Story

The Heel-less Posh

September 29, 2008 06:31:24 Posted at September 29, 2008 06:31:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Always entertaining, the Beckhams. Always better together than they are apart. Love. Them. And you are not seeing things. Here are Victoria and David in NYC at Macy’s on Friday promoting their new fragrance Signature. She is wearing thigh high boots, 5 and a half inches… without a heel. Full Story

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DanRad > Katie?

September 26, 2008 07:21:12 Posted at September 26, 2008 07:21:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Equus opened on Broadway last night with Daniel Radcliffe receiving rave reviews. Much more enthusiastic than Katie Holmes’s debut a week earlier. Oh but he’s…. so not cute anymore. Photos attached of Dan on stage and at the afterparty with his gross pubey facial hair in an awkward, if you’re trying to be ironic it’s definitely not working, dorky looking suit. Full Story

Worst Emmy Hair: Jennifer Love Hewitt

September 22, 2008 07:44:12 Posted at September 22, 2008 07:44:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Size Two wore her hair for a small town prom. Or a small town wedding circa 1995. How the f&ck does this get past security? How the f&ck did she find a stylist even willing to do this? Ken Paves wouldn’t do this! Even Ken Paves would draw the line at this! I’m telling you…when you have to go out of state to get your hair did, it’s wrong. Full Story

Worst Emmy Makeup: Eva Longoria Parker

September 22, 2008 07:27:00 Posted at September 22, 2008 07:27:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Too much hanging out with Posh. This is vintage Victoria Beckham: make everyone around you look worse. It’s working with Eva Longoria. And of course, it’s easy enough with Ken Paves cocking up her hair. The dress doesn’t help either. Of course it’s f&cking Marchesa! Photos from  Full Story