Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Robo Androgynous

August 4, 2008 06:19:46 Posted at August 4, 2008 06:19:46
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I was wrong. When she wore skinnys last week, I was wrong in saying she could read, read what we’ve been saying about these jeans. Because the jeans are back. The jeans are here to stay. The Robobride androgynous jeans are now an intrinsic part of KatE Holmes. Just like her ass awful hair. And her geriatric style. Full Story

She can read!

August 1, 2008 08:35:00 Posted at August 1, 2008 08:35:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

MUCH better. So.Much.Better. This is Katie Holmes today in NYC, thankfully NOT wearing those jeans. You know those jeans. Perhaps she perused the internets? Perhaps Posh called her to give a girl a tip? Hell nah. Full Story

Posh …the GMD… and Madge too?

July 28, 2008 06:16:06 Posted at July 28, 2008 06:16:06
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You remember the sneaker wedges, don’t you? Remember when Posh wore them to throw out the first pitch at the Dodger’s game last year? And then Tom Cruise borrowed them for Little Sci’s birthday party in April? Photos are attached. Remember??? Posh and the GMD … understandable. Full Story

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The Bad Gay Influence

July 25, 2008 07:55:07 Posted at July 25, 2008 07:55:07
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s a shocking title. Because normally you’d think there really is no such thing. But Ken Paves is an anomaly. Ken Paves is, maybe, the only gay on the face of the earth whose hag always looks WORSE when he’s around. Consider the magnitude of this statement: Jessica Simpson is more attractive under the watch of her locker room stinky, football playing, jock strap wearing boyfriend than she is with her Main ‘Mo. Full Story

The Thinnification of the GMD

July 21, 2008 06:55:15 Posted at July 21, 2008 06:55:15
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There were photos published very recently of the GMD taking his shirt off, showing off some middle aged back fat. A meltdown, mental AND physical, clearly ensued. Because Tom Cruise turned up at a racing event in Laguna Seca on Sunday showing off a much more streamlined physique. Check out those skinny jeans! As far as jeans are concerned though, his wife’s are hurting. Full Story

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Hermy Shelfy at the ESPYs

July 17, 2008 16:00:00 Posted at July 17, 2008 16:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

And she TRIED. She totally tried. The shoes will tell you that. She tried and she SUCKED!!! Check out Shelf Ass Jessica Biel at the ESPYs last night where her Pippy was hosting. It’s the bangs, it’s the greasy pinhead ponytail, it’s a man wearing the tanktop and a skirt. Justin Timberlake is dating a herm. Full Story

Bride Hair at the ESPYs

July 17, 2008 06:42:30 Posted at July 17, 2008 06:42:30
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Don’t know what she was thinking with this hair.’s the worst. Like at the Costume Institute Gala. Like bride hair. Like not stylish. At all. Even though she says she has an eye for it. That she considers herself fashionable. That fashion is her “industry.” And still she decided to get her hair done at Dolly Parton’s salon from Steel Magnolias. Full Story

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Little Tom, Big Lift!

July 16, 2008 09:03:39 Posted at July 16, 2008 09:03:39
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Eagle-eye Jamie K pointed this out after analysing the GMD photos from earlier. Note that he’s borrowing Victoria Beckhams trainer wedges again! LOVE the man-wedges! What do you reckon? At least an inch and a half? Photos from  Full Story

Stay-at-home dad

July 16, 2008 06:50:21 Posted at July 16, 2008 06:50:21
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Katie Holmes was on set at Eli Stone yesterday to shoot a cameo – the GMD brought Little Sci to visit mom at work. And also to check up on her, making sure there’s no secret getaway plan. After all, Johnny Lee Miller was once married to Angelina Jolie. And Johnny Lee Miller is infinitely sexier than the Gay Midget Dwarf. Full Story

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Her Tits Are Waving

July 14, 2008 11:42:11 Posted at July 14, 2008 11:42:11
Lainey Posted by Lainey

More photos of Jessica Simpson from this weekend – this time on a yacht with family members and her dog Daisy, serving up her breasts on display for the paps. The good news: no more tranny. The bad news: tranny’s been replaced by a porny. Is Porny > Tranny? Photos from Full Story

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Tits & Romo in Tahoe

July 14, 2008 06:09:30 Posted at July 14, 2008 06:09:30
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Tony Romo played in a golf tournament at Lake Tahoe the other day, Jessica Simpson flew in to join him with her sister and brother-in-law. As you can see, Jess, wearing white, tried to sneak into the event incognito. Very subtle. While in Tahoe Jess and Tony also showed up at the Heart concert. Holy sh*t. Full Story

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