Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Jess and the Maxi Dress

July 3, 2008 08:03:43 Posted at July 3, 2008 08:03:43
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Here’s Jessica Simpson yesterday spending time with a friend’s baby and also her Main Gay Ken Paves. Am not a fan of the maxi dress on regular sized, not tall girls. Not flattering. And something about the fact that your feet can’t be seen…it’s weird. On a red carpet, at a gala…fine. Full Story

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Tina Makes Hair too?

June 25, 2008 07:01:00 Posted at June 25, 2008 07:01:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

All too familiar with her tacky ass dress designs… now is Tina Knowles designing weave too? This is Solange Knowles, B’s sister, last night on the carpet at the BET Awards. The hair…. What.The.Ass is up with that hair??? Why is everything so cheap? Why did she rip off shoes from an Asian rub’n’tug? Why are they still letting their mother dictate their style??? Photos from Splashnewsonline.com Full Story

Worst. Taupe. Ever

June 23, 2008 09:44:50 Posted at June 23, 2008 09:44:50
Lainey Posted by Lainey

They say that we are too hard on celebrities… that once in a while, since we are allowed to look like schlubs, celebrities should be allowed to look like schlubs. That we should be more kind and forgiving when they walk around wearing ass. I agree… to a point. Because when we look like schlubs it’s because we’re usually walking the dog at 6 in the morning. Full Story

The New Nicole Doesn’t Have to Look Hungry

June 18, 2008 05:48:44 Posted at June 18, 2008 05:48:44
Lainey Posted by Lainey

She must have been pulling an MK Olsen move at the Women in Film Crystal Lucy Awards in LA last night – Nicole Richie dressing for the esoteric and it’s not so much the Audubon inspired dress print but that the dress itself is not flattering…at all. Needless to say, it will also likely spark a new round of pregnancy speculation. Full Story

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The Worst Heidi

June 17, 2008 07:23:01 Posted at June 17, 2008 07:23:01
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s all relative, of course. Heidi Klum’s worst is everyone else’s impossible best. But last night at the Peabody Awards was an example of how a beautiful woman can age herself horribly. And it was far from Heidi’s best. Not really sure what is it but she looks like there’d be vodka coursing through her veins and a raspy cigarette voice coming out of her mouth. Full Story

Gerry’s Paparazzi Day

June 6, 2008 07:10:06 Posted at June 6, 2008 07:10:06
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The Newroom is down the street from The Ivy on Robertson. If you’re eating on Robertson, you’re there for a reason: you want to be seen. It is an indisputable fact. Why hang out with the paps when there are so many other, and better!, places to eat in West Hollywood? So here’s Gerard Butler yesterday after lunch at the Newsroom, photographed by several outlets, perhaps because he’s finally achieved a slight improvement on the way he wears his pants. Full Story

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Niagara Falls Wedding

June 5, 2008 13:07:00 Posted at June 5, 2008 13:07:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Have you been to Niagara Falls? If you’ve been, you know that one of the most popular tourist attractions is the barrel photo - a picture taken of you inside a barrel perched in front of the falls made to look like you’re going down. There’s a hilarious one of my mother in the barrel from back in the 70s. Full Story

It’s Coming

June 2, 2008 04:55:32 Posted at June 2, 2008 04:55:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey

All the signs are there… Just before John Mayer broke up with Jessica Simpson, she was photographed wearing those infamous high waisted pants, a little bloated from drowning her pre-breakup heartache into much food and booze, incapable of thinking straight, let alone being able to dress herself properly. Full Story

Newlyweds in Cannes

May 26, 2008 07:01:00 Posted at May 26, 2008 07:01:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Has it only been 6 weeks? INF caught Beyonce and Jay-Z last night in Cannes in a rare moment of affection before they spotted photographers and disentangled themselves. Love them but don’t understand why he lets her out of the house like that. Full Story

Do you like long pants?

May 15, 2008 12:59:00 Posted at May 15, 2008 12:59:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Fireworks on the Croisette tonight – real ones and Pitty Porn styles too. It’s one of my favourites about Cannes: the firework display at 10:30pm followed by a rousing chorus of horns from all the surround ships in the harbour. Gives me goosebumps every time. Just like Pitt Porn gives me quivers. Full Story

No Mojo at Blindness

May 15, 2008 04:28:30 Posted at May 15, 2008 04:28:30
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There was a time when Mischa Barton was considered a style girl. She and Nicole Richie had a funky friends together kinda thing going on that used to be pretty cute. Then again, I’m a Mischa apologist. I liked the weird moccasins, she did have a certain “it”. But lately? Longer than lately? Mischa has lost her mojo. Full Story