Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Looking Rough at Dior

May 13, 2008 05:02:29 Posted at May 13, 2008 05:02:29
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony, yesterday in New York at the Christian Dior Cruise 2009 Collection private event. You’d think she of all people would be rocking a post-baby glow, non? Shockingly it’s been quite the opposite. Simply put, she looks like sh*t. The face is sh*t. Her hair is sh*t. Full Story

What’s On Your Head?

April 11, 2008 10:09:00 Posted at April 11, 2008 10:09:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Paula Abdul showed up at Lisa Kline last night and… well… see for yourselves. Can you identify the species on her head? Photos from  Full Story

When Bad Hair…

April 10, 2008 13:34:00 Posted at April 10, 2008 13:34:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Happens to a supermodel. It’s a testament to Christy’s undisputed gorgessity that her face remains unaffected. Because when most of us wear bad hair, everything else goes to sh*t too. But still… Not even Christy Turlington can pull off this half mullet. WTF??? This is Christy yesterday at the FilmAid International Power of Film Gala last night in New York with locks that belong on a head to toe denim-clad chainsmoking gravel voiced hick from a bumf&ck small town with missing teeth minding a corner store alongside a husband who might be her brother. Full Story

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Kate Hudson and Dangling Dicks

April 10, 2008 12:06:00 Posted at April 10, 2008 12:06:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

As gorgeous as she is, sometimes Kate Hudson just flies off the rails, you know what I mean? Check it out – Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey in London for the premiere of Fool’s Gold. I have no idea what the f&ck she’s wearing. It’s atrocious. And gawdy. And those two ropes hanging off her sleeves with the tassels… they remind me of China’s Empress Dowager Cixi – that old bat who you always associate with eunuchs. Full Story

The Jim Face on Today

April 4, 2008 09:07:00 Posted at April 4, 2008 09:07:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Everyone’s boyfriend next door John Krasinski stopped by The Today Show this morning to promote Leatherheads opening today. There’s the trademark sheepish look – the one that makes us quiver. But …. I hate his hair. John can’t “do” his hair. His hair just won’t get “done”. Full Story

Whitesnake Jackson

March 31, 2008 07:18:00 Posted at March 31, 2008 07:18:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Here I go again on my ownGoin’ down the only road I’ve ever known Sigh… I miss the 80s. And I miss this video. Pure 80s rock video cheese. With Tawny Kitaen (isn’t that the best name ever???!!??) writhing on top of a jaguar… they just don’t make videos like that anymore, you know? Or perhaps they do. Full Story

Simon Darker

March 25, 2008 08:48:00 Posted at March 25, 2008 08:48:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

A one time member of the Freebie Five, Simon Pegg was on hand last night at the premiere of Run Fatboy Run, costarring Thandie Newton and directed by David Schwimmer. Yes, that David Schwimmer. The man who played limp Ross. Limp Ross who was inconceivably written as Rachel Green’s lobster… which to me has always been a television mystery. Full Story

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Jake’s Improving Pants

March 19, 2008 08:21:00 Posted at March 19, 2008 08:21:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The wash isn’t great. Far from great. And they’re still far from ideal too. But it’s an improvement. A small improvement but nevertheless an improvement. Jake is trying to properly wear his pants. This is a good thing. Check him out yesterday after a meeting, hot as ever, though still trouser challenged. Full Story

Brendan Fraser Has No Friends

March 14, 2008 09:24:00 Posted at March 14, 2008 09:24:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Because If he had friends, true friends, they would tell him straight up – dude, don’t fight it man. Just go bald. Clearly Brendan has no friends. And he no longer has a wife either. Maybe that’s why he’s trying to save his manhood by faking his hair. Or maybe this is what prompted her to leave. Full Story

How Brits Cut

March 10, 2008 10:24:00 Posted at March 10, 2008 10:24:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

No one can cut you like a Brit… or my mother. It was her birthday yesterday, she called me at 2 in the afternoon: “It’s my birthday today. Were you at the gym?” So few words, so much sting. Guilting me, of course, for not calling her at the crack of dawn. And, given that I never go to the gym, suggesting that I would be there because, obviously, I need to work off some weight. Full Story