Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Natalie surges ahead

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 2, 2010 07:53:00 September 2, 2010 07:53:00

Black Swan opened the Venice Film Festival yesterday and the reviews have been largely positive. Even when they’re not positive, they’re not total sh-t either, and the critics who love it, really really do love it, some even going so far as to call Black Swan Darren Aronofsky’s first masterpiece, with his leading lady, Natalie Portman, delivering what many agree to be the finest, most nuanced, most impressive performance of her career. Full Story

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Emmy Awards 2010

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 30, 2010 08:02:00 August 30, 2010 08:02:00

I thought the open was really good. And two Canadians represented too – both Cory Monteith and Nina Dobrev were invited to join in the Springsteen Glee homage led by Jimmy Fallon and almost stolen by Jon Hamm’s amazingness. As for Fallon as host, well, it was a strong beginning and then the singing fallback got a little tired. Full Story

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Jakey lets it grow...and the wrong Rachel

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 30, 2010 06:52:00 August 30, 2010 06:52:00

Jake Gyllenhaal was photographed visiting a friend this weekend in LA, dressed down in torn khakis and flipflops and a lot facial hair. There might also be a little too much carbohydrate activity happening in his life right now too. Something about the way his shirt is hanging – or not hanging – off of him and these pants around in hips. Full Story

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Holiday clothes for Chinese people

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 26, 2010 09:56:00 August 26, 2010 09:56:00

When my mother sees this ensemble she’ll be all over me to buy it for her. Forget the House of the Sh-ts, Beysus should really be Made For China. It’s tacky, it’s gold, and there are 8s all over. Double 8s too. Really, you can’t go wrong. What’s our obsession with the Number 8? The word for 8 sounds kinda like the word for rich. Full Story

Chicken Fried, Beysus, and the Sh-t House

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 25, 2010 09:03:41 August 25, 2010 09:03:41

Britney Spears is in Hawaii with her man Jason Trawick. Jason Trawick’s body > Jensen Ackles’s body. Right??? I like ‘em lean. Fried Chicken managed to clean up her weave in time for the holiday, or maybe that’s because we can’t see it from the back. Britney is relaxing after a productive week – she shot for Glee and she’s been working in studio on a new album. Full Story

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Sinkhole & Sons

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 19, 2010 07:48:52 August 19, 2010 07:48:52

Should be the name of a plumbing company. Chicken Fried Britney tweeted from the Glee set yesterday – photo attached – where she’s working on the all-Britney episode which is kinda like reminding her: see how awesome you used to be before the crazy took over? At some point during the day, Britney also hooked up with her kids, took them to Johnny Rockets. Full Story

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Tired in Berlin and Christmas with Depp

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 18, 2010 08:51:12 August 18, 2010 08:51:12

An exhausted looking Angelina Jolie continues her Salt European tour with a stop in Berlin today at a photocall ahead of the premiere. Dress is much better than the one from Paris last night but goddamn that fringe, that curled under fringe, that is such a hick ass looking fringe. How can we stop the tucking of the fringe? In other Jolie news, she and Johnny Depp will be coming to us for the holidays. Full Story

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An unfortunate dress in Japan

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 18, 2010 08:05:12 August 18, 2010 08:05:12

It really, really is. Julia Roberts isn’t a Dries van Noten girl. Maggie Gyllenhaal, sure. Julia Roberts... not this time. When Darren and I went to see the movie last week full of Oprah people, this dress was like their uniform. Here’s Julia in Japan at a presser today to promote Eat, Pray, Love. Full Story

Angie’s dressing problem

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 17, 2010 14:15:05 August 17, 2010 14:15:05

In fairness, she’s never been called a style icon or anything so I guess it’s not like we expect her to get us all jizzy about her clothes but still... When you look like Angelina Jolie, it shouldn’t be this hard. Or this bad. It’s a direct assault against that saying – xyz would look good in a paper bag. Full Story

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She came from Hilary Duff’s wedding

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 17, 2010 08:04:06 August 17, 2010 08:04:06

Is that why Jennifer Aniston wore a bridesmaid dress to The Switch premiere last night? I don’t care if it’s Lanvin. The way she’s wearing it she’s holding a bouquet and standing 3 girls from the bride. Especially with those shoes. Said it before, will say again, Jen has the worst shoe style for someone who claims they love shoes. Full Story

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Little Sci is to blame

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 16, 2010 07:11:11 August 16, 2010 07:11:11

How many times have we looked at a Katie Holmes outfit and asked what is that f-ckedupNESS that you are wearing? Thank you Lafayette. We have Little Sci Suri Cruise to blame. At least that’s what Katie says. It’s a new interview with New York Magazine under the pretence of “fall fashion” but really, they probably just wanted to get up close and observe her freaky zombie life for themselves. Full Story