Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Assy Glee style

January 12, 2010 12:37:20 Posted at January 12, 2010 12:37:20
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Oh Dianna Agron. You are hurting me. Sunday night it was overdressed feathers. Last night at a Fox party it was a virgin length dress and maybe the most offensive shoes I’ve seen in a long, long time. She’s, like, 20. And those are 20 x 3. Sh-t. These Glee girls need some proper styling. Full Story

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Posh’s replacement is a brand mistake

January 12, 2010 08:59:52 Posted at January 12, 2010 08:59:52
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Megan Fox has taken over from Victoria Beckham at Armani underwear. The new ads have been released. Megan, unlike Victoria however, is allowed to wear some real clothes. Not sure what that’s all about. Here’s the problem with Armani’s Fox selection – and it has nothing to do with Megan’s obnoxious attitude and the sh-t that comes out of her mouth and the poor-man’s Jolie-ness about her entire image. Full Story

Overdressed Glee next Blake?

January 11, 2010 14:04:00 Posted at January 11, 2010 14:04:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Blair Waldorf is the star on Gossip Girl. Period. But Leighton Meester is not the marquee star of Gossip Girl. Even though she’s the better actor, even though she plays the superior character, even though she gets the best lines, Leighton is undeniably and criminally the Andrew Ridgeley to Blake Lively’s George Michael. Full Story

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Chicken Fried bald patches and stains

January 8, 2010 07:06:58 Posted at January 8, 2010 07:06:58
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I’m telling you, she scares me when she’s a brunette. Her world isn’t right when she’s brunette. And the way she looked yesterday out and about in LA wasn’t right at all. Especially since this is “pulled together” for her. In the sense that she’s not out in her pyjamas which, as you know, happens from time to time. Full Story

Stop showing me your thighs

January 4, 2010 14:06:58 Posted at January 4, 2010 14:06:58
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I am a fickle bitch. Ordinarily this is not a particularly positive attribute but it can be quite useful when it comes to objects of fantasy. The whole point of a Freebie 5 is what happens with the unattainable quiver. They can’t unattainable quiver if they suck sh-t. Laura, my friend with the Robert Pattinson problem, is always pointing this out about me. Full Story

No playoffs for the famous

January 4, 2010 10:30:28 Posted at January 4, 2010 10:30:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Marc Anthony bought into the Miami Dolphins this season. He and his wife have made it a home game tradition to roll out some kind of carpet, and Fergie, also a co-owner, showed up yesterday with Josh Duhamel to round out the season…which was a losing one. So many famous faces. No appearance in the playoffs. Full Story

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Best of 2009: Porny at the Chili Cook-off!

December 31, 2009 14:51:46 Posted at December 31, 2009 14:51:46
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Please. You know it was coming. There’s a special place in my heart for Jessica Simpson. She isn’t evil inside like Ebola Hilton. Porny’s issues stem from her father’s f-ckery, and the lack of true friendship and brain mass. But she’s not ill intentioned. There is genuine affection here. Full Story

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Worst of 2009: Ed Westwick at Teen Choice

December 30, 2009 08:23:39 Posted at December 30, 2009 08:23:39
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You’ve blocked it out, haven’t you? My Shamef-ck showed up at Teen Choice in August shamef-cking me to hell in his rolled up jeans and no socks and loafers, puckering his lips and posing like a cross dressing private school punk ballerina stuck inside a music box, what? I don’t know what. Full Story

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JLo’s losing season

December 28, 2009 07:33:28 Posted at December 28, 2009 07:33:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Ugh. My Dolphins pissed away the season. They lost yesterday to the Texans and can “technically” still make the playoffs but only IF they win next week and FOUR OTHER TEAMS LOSE. Please. It’s a waste of a season. And it’s Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez’s inaugural losing season. Full Story

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Robo’s lumberjack heels

December 24, 2009 07:40:47 Posted at December 24, 2009 07:40:47
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Katie Holmes went shopping yesterday on her own … with bodyguards. Wonder what Little Sci is getting from Hermes. Along the way, she ran into a friend and remembered how to smile. Exhausted from all the money spending, Katie hit up the Starbucks for a coffee break. You will note, she’s dressed casually in jeans, a lumberjack shirt…and heels. Full Story

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Worst of 2009: Robo Gumby & Stumpy

December 21, 2009 15:39:31 Posted at December 21, 2009 15:39:31
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Remember when Robo went to Washington for Memorial Day events and walked around on stilts? …the f-ck was up with these giant long leg pants? Five minutes later she was wearing terribly unflattering “mom on holiday” jeans. Indeed, 2009 gave us many Robo assy style moments. Some she designed, some others designed, and all made worse by her “creative eye”, now on sale at Maxfield, one of the most high priced exclusive shoppes in Los Angeles. Full Story