Assy Style Articles

Bad celebrity fashion including Hollywood's worst dressed, out of date looks ugly red carpet, outfits and shoes, makeup mishaps, bad hair, and other fashion misses.

Daniel’s pants

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 12, 2008 13:35:00 December 12, 2008 13:35:00

So… It hurts to say it. But this is Daniel Craig today in London and he’s not wearing his pants… very well. Especially that side shot. Like the ass and the tapering. It’s a little Ed Westwick! Ew! I’m sorry! But it’s true! He needs new jeans! Don’t mind the beanie though. Full Story

Fergie in sateen at Selfridges

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2008 08:39:00 December 11, 2008 08:39:00

The bane of Michelle’s existence: sateen. Even worse when it comes to celebrities because you’d think they know how sh-tty sateen photographs. This is Fergie today at Selfridges in London promoting MAC. Extremely unflattering. As is the high collar though I suppose it’s not fair. Because I’ve already mentioned her neck isn’t all that cute either. Full Story

Wouldn’t you?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 8, 2008 06:41:00 December 8, 2008 06:41:00

People reports that Ginnifer Goodwin and Chris Klein are over. Like…do you blame her? Wouldn’t you? She’s cute! And him? Well… Look at him. Look at what he’s become. Like I said at the time these images were originally posted – oh revolting Travolta! And he’s a loser douche. Full Story

His Pants!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 4, 2008 13:00:49 December 4, 2008 13:00:49

There is nothing wrong with your eyes. That is indeed the GMD. And his pants… his pants are hanging ever so slightly better. Slightly. An infinitesimal amount. But an infinitesimal improvement nonetheless. How did this happen? Well, he looks like he’s lost weight. Probably working out super hard to promote Valkyrie. Full Story

Holiday white wedgies!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 4, 2008 07:34:37 December 4, 2008 07:34:37

The GMD and Little Sci were sighted yesterday in New York…and so were his white wedge sneakers – for extra, extra lift! How many pairs did he custom order? They’re always so new and fresh. You think he has a cobbler on permanent payroll? Someone who knows how to install the height trickery in every pair of new shoes? Like an official Scientologist Cobbler? I am totally convinced… As for Little Sci – so many of you emailed yesterday after seeing Granny Freeze holding her Sunday, remarking that it’s just like how Tom Cruise holds his daughter too… like total novices. Full Story

Finally Aguilera

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 4, 2008 06:52:38 December 4, 2008 06:52:38

Been complaining about Christina Aguilera and her repeat medley-ing from the VMAs and then at the AMAs…but last night, last night she made up for it all. A wickedly restrained performance at the Grammy nomination show with no freaky sideshow gimmicks, no dancing thank God, no copycat Lady Gaga styles, just straight up singing, quality singing with a limited amount of vocal gymnastics… It was heaven. Full Story

Douchebags have Soul Patches

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 24, 2008 08:02:00 November 24, 2008 08:02:00

It’s currently my favourite site: Hot Chicks With Douchebags. In all fairness, the chicks are super douchey too, but it’s a reminder, when lulled into thinking that good taste will prevail… No. Never. This is why Billy Cyrus has lasted longer than acid wash jeans. Full Story

JailBait at the AMAs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 24, 2008 07:57:13 November 24, 2008 07:57:13

She celebrated her birthday on Sunday at the American Music Awards. Finally but only16. And rumoured to be already living with her loser 20 year old boyfriend with the blessing of her father. This must be why Miley Cyrus keeps looking older every time we see her. Last night it was like she aged 10 years. Full Story

Glitter at the AMAs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 24, 2008 07:34:00 November 24, 2008 07:34:00

Ugh. So over the Vegas look. And so over Christina Aguilera. Does she matter anymore? Her performance was my pee break, maybe because last night, as it was at the VMAs in September, it was another medley of old music. Seriously, that is some lame sh-t. Like if you have nothing new to offer, why the f-ck are you there??? Then there’s Taylor Swift, Christina’s straight banged and glitter sister. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

It’s always herm on her

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 20, 2008 11:21:59 November 20, 2008 11:21:59

Picture the hat and the cute dress and the flats, picture it on Rachel McAdams, or Nicole Richie, on anyone else but Shelfy. Love it, right? But Shelf Ass Jessica Biel, she herms up everything she wears. It’s not about being too fit. Too fit is great. But the gracelessness, as though a low “guhhhh” follows her wherever she goes, makes “pretty” an entirely inappropriate attribute for the love of Pippy’s life. Full Story

These are not the tights

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 19, 2008 10:23:35 November 19, 2008 10:23:35

Duana and I debated every day in Paris about those Chanel tights. So amazing. So expensive. $400. Le sigh. We walked away. But these… These earrings… These are not the tights. So not the same thing. Beyonce turned up to the Gotham Magazine Gala in New York last night with these bobbing above her shoulders. Full Story