Audio Rossum

June 27, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 27, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

EXTREME CAUTION. You WILL be nauseous…be warned.

Emmy Rossum bringing the Full Rossum to race car driving this past weekend. She sang the national anthem and to be fair, Emmy has a decent voice. Even a good voice. And at the very least it wasn’t Jessica Simpson-styles vocal gymnastics. So many artists these days enjoy raping a classic piece of music, you know what I mean?

But still… after all the positives, there remains the sickening sickness. The Rossum in her full might – not successful in finding film opportunities after Phantom and a couple of disaster movies, Emmy of course is now embarking on a career as a vocalist.

She is 20 years old. The lamest 20 year old, like, ever. And the most obnoxious enunciation ever.

Like so:

Normal – Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there
Rossum – Gave proof through the nawt thawt ahhh flawg was still there

Normal – O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave
Rossum – O’er the lawnd of the free awnd the hohm of the brahv

And to top it all, there"s the "eye closing".  The singing with the eyes closed - only the cheesiest of cheese moves made even more cheese with an added dose of Rossum revolting. 

Dale Earnhardt Jr"s face kills me - check him out. Like...WTF???

I’m telling you…she will bring up your lunch. I promise.

Click here for the clip. Get well soon.

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