Violet Affleck and my Celebrity Baby Theory

April 11, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at April 11, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Do you need a recap? Refresh your memory here and then take a look, the first very clear look, of wee Violet Affleck who might very well challenge Apple Martin for baby cuteness supremacy. Now depending on your particular point of view, Violet comes from one of 2 combinations: either a hot father and an average mother or an average father and a hot mother. Personally, I"m assessing it as Dad Hot, Mom Average. And your emails arguing in favour of Garner"s imaginary sizzle. The girl is taupe at worst, cute at best. Besides, cute is highly underrated these days. Not everyone can be full on gorgessity you know. Regardless, however you break it down, Violet clearly falls under the "Hot + Average = Fairly Attractive" Rule. And hey, if neither Ben or Jen deserve hotness in your books, there"s always the "Average + Average = Hot" formula. Either way you slice it, the kid will grow up goodlooking. And "average" has everything to do with it. NB. I"ve received many, many emails protesting the validity of this theory, listing real life friends as examples. I completely agree. Which is why this isn"t a GENERAL theory, it"s a CELEBRITY BABY THEORY - the Goddess"s way of balancing things out. So although there are certainly exceptions - think Cindy Crawford - for the most part, I think it stands up quite nicely. And this explains why I"ve got $100 riding on the Aniston/Vaughn (Average + Average = Hot) child ending up WAY better packaged than the (Hot + Hot = Ugly) Pitt/Jolie one.
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