Worst Globes Mindf-ck: Benedict Cumberbatch
I have heard the name for years. I’ve seen the articles and whatnot. I knew he existed, but I never really paid attention until now, you know? I finally sort of really connected the face to the name for good.
I feel like someone is f-cking with me.
Like is this a big joke? Did you all get together just to punk me in this particular way? Guys, come on. Come on guys, let’s all laugh together now.
That is the guy everyone’s all hot for? Are you being super-serious right now? That guy. With that hair, and that chin? Are you for real? Is it – does he maybe walk in a really great way, or something? Has he made significant contributions to charity for puppies? Because I can’t conceive of anything that would make this man attractive, including giving him actual lips.
I realize part of the appeal is that he’s Sherlock Holmes, to which I am pleased to say I prefer Johnny Lee Miler, not least because he has lips.
The dude seemed charming and polite in the brief interview I saw with him. I have seen photos of him and indeed his face is the required medium-symmetrical. I just have slight nausea at having to see him undressed, or in any way “romantic”. Uh…you can have him.
(Lainey: Poor Duana. She doesn’t know. She doesn’t know the assload amount of hate she’s about to receive from the Cumberbatch fangirls -- they call themselves “Cumberbitches" -- now. I can’t wait I can’t wait I can’t wait! Duana can be reached @duanaelise. Good luck.)
Christopher Polk/ Kevork Djansezian/ NBC