The Brange Conspiracy

June 6, 2008 06:46:53 Posted at June 6, 2008 06:46:53
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It was a week ago that Entertainment Tonight confirmed that Angelina Jolie had given birth to twin girls. A week ago that the Brange reps denied ET’s report and since then a full scale investigation has been launched into the “conspiracy” that prompted one of the safest, most mainstream, MiniVan-catering shows to forge ahead boldly with what turned out to be a bogus story. Or was it?

ET backtracked on the announcement but has yet (at press time) to recant and has revealed their story was based on what seemed to be a very legitimate email, sent from a legitimate looking email address, from Angie’s legitimate assistant Holly. Click here for the full run down.

Very cloak and dagger, non? And dramatic too. Drama befitting the most glorious double deities to grace this good earth, almost as though they are to be the first twins born, like, ever.

Adding mystery to it all is that Angelina hasn’t been seen in over a week, thereby unable to provide unmistakable proof that she’s still pregnant, leading some to speculate that the ET story was indeed true and that the couple is holding back the birth confirmation for reasons related to the supposed $15 million value of those exclusive first photos that will no doubt come with exclusive first details about the day the heavens parted and they floated down from the sky.

There is also the question of Brad Pitt’s movements. While Angie remains safely ensconced…somewhere… Brad has been photographed on a couple of public outings – in Italy and in Switzerland – and it would seem that Houston was whipped into a Pitt frenzy this week as almost half the city insisted he was in town with Sean Penn. Phone lines on local radio stations lit up with sightings, Perez Hilton received the tip, and several readers also swear he was there even though the Pitt-friendly People Magazine put him in Switzerland on Tuesday and reported that he went back to family right away.

Was a phantom Brad floating around Houston? Was it a serious case of Brangelunacy that caused the good residents of Houston to start having Brad Pitt visions?

But you didn’t expect a drama-free double deity delivery, did you? Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie… do they ever do anything quietly? Absolutely not. They are the consummate entertainers – which is why I will always, happily, buy what they are selling.

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