The Family Pitt rumour mill

May 30, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at May 30, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Must have received over a 100 emails over the last 2 days about that herpes thing. Some chick claiming to have worked for 20th Century Fox sent in an email to some blog claiming that Angelina"s c-section was a medical necessity due to the fact that she has herpes and couldn"t risk passing the virus on to the baby. According to the message, Brad became infected too, which is why Jennifer left him. Right. STDs and Hollywood - hey, sounds good to me...Except the supposed insider"s information is full of holes. And the most ridiculous part in all of this is that some radio stations actually reported it as fact. WTF??? Not that the story doesn"t get my smutty dirty juices flowing but there are several, several problems with the report. First of all, she lumped Angelina in with other stars including Jennifer Garner, Kate Hudson, and Madonna claiming the aforementioned ladies also had herpes which necessitated the caesarian route. Newsflash. Jennifer Garner did not have a c-section. Jennifer Garner delivered naturally. Jennifer Garner is also not a Scientologist because she screamed her bloody head off - as I reported on December 4th, 2005 from a SLAMDUNK source who was situated in the hospital room next door. As for Kate Hudson, Denise Richards, Victoria Beckham, Madonna and all the other girls who go for the slice - no, gossips…it"s not because of herpes. It"s because: 1. they don"t want childbirth to interfere with their busy schedules and more importantly 2. (as Dr. Baily on Grey"s Anatomy would say) they don"t want their vajayjays getting too loose for nooky. Which is almost worse than having yourself cut open to avoid herpes transmission. And a word about their future plans. Although In Touch is reporting a return to the states while Brad supposedly travels to LA for Oceans 13, I"ve heard Angie"s contemplating staying behind with the children in the French countryside. All dependent on Daddy"s schedule of course but if he can wrangle a relatively short shooting frame - between 2 and 3 weeks - they could definitely make it work in France for most of the summer, if not longer. This way, Angelina can remain in Europe for any early Fall UN meetings and stay much closer to Africa, where they plan to return before the close of the year. The main focus right now however, other than Shiloh of course, is Maddox"s education. They are considering several options, including homeschooling and private tutoring vs conventional facilities which would require a less travel-intensive lifestyle. The problem with Los Angeles obviously is the fishbowl existence. And - ahem - rumour has it, Brad isn"t crazy about the system. Having spent so much time on the continent recently, Brad and Angelina were able to get some insight into international educational standards and my sources say these are the factors weighing on their minds. Will keep you posted as I"m told they change their minds every day. And finally…gotta love those clever cats at Gallery of the Absurd! who seem to have bought into my Celebrity Baby Theory with this hilarious interpretation of what Shiloh will look like. Hate to be a bitch but remember … Hot + Hot = UGLY. It"s the Goddess"s way of balancing out the beauty universe.
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