Chicken Fried foot issues

October 22, 2009 18:25:32 Posted at October 22, 2009 18:25:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Britney Spears took her booboos to the movies today. In Calabasas. Which is in California. And it’s warm there. Warm enough to wear shorts and a tank. Am looking online at today’s weather report. It was 27°C today, or 80°F. Some would call that hot. I call that hot.

And there’s that fried chicken walking around with furry boots.

I already have nightmares about her foot hygiene. That time she went into a public washroom at a gas station without shoes or socks…f-ck. You might as well kill me. I am neurotic about body clean. Jacek thinks I have a problem. I tend to fixate. Like if something is already gross, in my mind it gets grosser. And then I can’t think about anything else. And then the itches come on. This is why I shower at least 3 times a day under a scalding stream. At minimum. I can’t leave the house and not come back and shower. Right now I’ve just come from the gym. So I’ve showered. But in an hour I might have to walk the dog. So I’ll walk the dog, and then I’ll shower because I went outside. And who knows what landed on me outside. See? This is why I can’t go camping. Never. This is why I find myself obsessed about her feet.

Because on a hot day, Britney’s wearing these boots. And the moisture, and the sweat, and the I can’t imagine what’s growing, and then she puts them back on, over and over again, and she probably doesn’t foot bathe before bedtime and it’s an endless trail of foot nasty all over the house…

I don’t want to live there.

As for what’s new with Team Spears – they want her to marry the agent or something? And she’s on the cover of the new Us Weekly. For a change it’s a positive story.

Photos from Clint Brewer/

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