Smutty Social Media, Thursday August 20, 2015
@Parisa/ Jen Lowery/ Splash News
Karlie Kloss was at the airport and took a photo of some of the September issues – she has two covers. She also tagged the magazines and the women in the photos – Oprah, Demi Lovato, Salma Hayek, Taylor Swift. You know who was omitted? Katy Perry. Don’t these “squad goal feminists” know anything? That just makes you look petty. And Taylor looks petty by association.
The Baldwins are upset over all the media headlines about them having 5 nannies. OK, let me play celebrity devil's advocate here: his original post thanked 5 women who have helped him and Hilaria with their children, he never said they were nannies. Maybe they were, but they could also be a doula, midwife, lactation consultant, night nurse – all different jobs. And isn’t having an abundance of care better than working one nanny to the bone, like so many of them do out of sheer cheapness?
Kathy Najimy! Do you think she was invited to Jennifer Aniston’s wedding? Jennifer used to have this really tight group of girlfriends – they spoke to Vanity Fair when she did her divorce cover – but you don’t hear much about them anymore.
Ashton Kutcher can’t even act in 15-second increments.
Edward Burns thanks his high school English teacher.
Britney and the Chocolate Factory.
Tami Taylor knows she has great hair. Because she does.
Reese continues her charm offensive. Southern living, she says, is when everyone greets each other with hugs. Who could live like that?! I just want to nod politely and be on my way.
Remember when people used to do this in the mirror and not feel compelled to share it with the world? I miss those days.