The result is always PURE GOLD. Of course she’s always pure gold but in Aspen it’s like the cheese concentration is extra strong. Every winter there’s an Aspen adventure. Every winter it’s her Christmas gift to the world. Here she is, squeezed into a tight pair of jeans, tottering around on a pair of sky high suede boots, holding on to her security as she gingerly waddles around town. Full Story

Maybe if you sell your wedding photos to a magazine you’re just f-cking asking for it. In light of what happened after… well… enough said. Remember these pictures? The original article is here and the entire album is here Full Story

Nick Cannon was mauled by a butterfly last night on the red carpet of the Teen Nick Halo Awards. Oh Mimi. She always makes me happy but these…these are extra extra cheesy special. Notice how she’s STILL TRYING TO POSE even when he’s coming in to kiss her? A reader called AM was at the event last night, lucky bitch, and was able to observe the Mimi tottering first hand. Full Story

It’s her new video. The one she was shooting on the beach – click here for a refresher. Her efforts that day have now been released. The juiciest 3 minutes of your day. Full Story

Mimi’s Cheese is coming up soon but first… You’d have to be humourless not to find joy in these photos of Celine Dion and her family at the Knicks game the other night in New York. What happens when the chest thumping lunge happy most expressive French Canadian fromage brings her amazingness to a sporting event? Gold. Full Story

When I need her. It’s been a rough week work-wise and other. Also I’ve been training like a fiend and “eating healthy” pre-holidays which means chicken every day, hate chicken to begin with, and nothing greasy and certainly no fried rice. Where is the joy? There is no joy. But Mimi brings the joy. Full Story

Best way to wash the sick of Polanski away? Mimi Cheese! Who else would appear on Ellen and show off her garters? Please. I just watched it this morning. It’s making up for the rain. She managed to walk by herself up to the couches. SO. PROUD. I have replayed this part 3 times. Because her face as she emerges, and the double waves, while tottering on her shoes, is the most amazing of amazingness in the history of amazings. Full Story

Sasha sent this over a while ago and I feel, like, GIDDY. High. Euphoric. As she put it, it’s like finding a f-cking pot of gold. There is SO much gold here. The way she can find an opportunity to burst into song, her OWN song, at any point in a conversaion, and the rant about her nails, and calling Nick in only to make him sit there like her lackey, and the look on her face when she talks about her swing, and Jodeci, and her DRESSING ROOM, and every other minute in between… 16 minutes of Mimi as she is. Full Story

Hello Kitty’s official anniversary is November 1st. But Mimi can’t go as Hello Kitty for Halloween every year, hell no. Especially now that her costume carries double weight these days. Don’t forget about Nick. Oh but she brings such joy. Mariah Carey is happiness. Don’t tell me you aren’t smiling. Full Story

Happiness is a rainy Friday Cheese break. It’s Mariah Carey, of course, tottering around in Rio yesterday. Her heels were too high and the surface too uneven for her to stick her ass and tits out in her signature pose but I do love the way that security man is holding her hand for balance. Every Mimi photo is a gift, non? Mimi honoured the fans waiting outside her hotel and signed autographs for them, in town for the Fashion Rocks event. Full Story

Mimi’s husband did not accompany her to Japan. Instead, he stayed back in New York and attended the Keep A Child Alive Black Ball last night. There was a time when, briefly, I flirted with the idea of making Nick Cannon my boyfriend. Drumline. I loved Drumline. He was hot in Drumline. And he was cool for a while after. Full Story

Mimi arrived in Tokyo today. Please. It’s like she takes her Cheese there for the restorative powers of the Far East. Hello Kitties make it stronger. See? Straight off the plane she’s already at the top of her cheddar: the ass is extra out one way, the tits are extra out the other way, teetering and tottering for her subjects, preening and primping the way only Mimi can preen and primp. Full Story

It comes with an accent. I wish I could post my voice recording it for you here because it’s way more entertaining when you know how to say it. Haaaa-low Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-zoooooooooooooooooooo. Let it stretch out of your mouth, and do it in a baby voice, and smile big the whole time with saucer eyes. Full Story

Oh Adrien Brody. He must be poor. It’s the only explanation. Just over a year ago, TIFF 2008, he was in Toronto for The Brothers Bloom. Duana and Michelle really enjoyed The Brothers Bloom. And we were all Brody fans. In person he has a style about him, an offbeat sexiness that is much more appealing in person. Full Story