Chills Chills Chills Articles

Celebrity news that gives you the chills

Emmy Breakup Thinnification

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 30, 2010 10:24:00 August 30, 2010 10:24:00

Kelly Osbourne ditched her boyfriend Luke Worrell about six weeks after she supposedly caught him cheating. She arrived at the Emmys with a very small waist in a very tight dress – looked lovely, sure, but that’s a lot of littleness that seems to have happened over a short period of time. Full Story

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Little Sci is to blame

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 16, 2010 07:11:11 August 16, 2010 07:11:11

How many times have we looked at a Katie Holmes outfit and asked what is that f-ckedupNESS that you are wearing? Thank you Lafayette. We have Little Sci Suri Cruise to blame. At least that’s what Katie says. It’s a new interview with New York Magazine under the pretence of “fall fashion” but really, they probably just wanted to get up close and observe her freaky zombie life for themselves. Full Story

A Big NOT Sci party

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 13, 2010 08:31:51 July 13, 2010 08:31:51

Here’s what’s weird: Every night I scan the photo agencies so I can get a sense of what I might write about the next day. These photos were up right before I went to bed – Will Smith with Jada and the GMD and several other celebrities and the photo agency was calling it a “Scientology party”. Full Story

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The GMD: his bff is laughing too

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 10, 2010 07:07:31 May 10, 2010 07:07:31

He’s been a pop culture punch line for years now thanks to his fontrum-y love for Katie Holmes and Oprah’s couch and Matt Lauer’s glibness and, well, somewhere along the way, Tom Cruise just became painfully uncool. So we laugh at him. But did you expect Xenu to be laughing at him too? His very, very best friend? The best man at his wedding? His fellow little macho man David Miscavige? According to Mark Rathbun, an ex Church member who’s been spilling its secrets, the GMD was required to record his deepest darkest secrets per Scientology policy – I guess it’s how they heal each other. Full Story

Indistinguishable

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2010 14:21:00 March 19, 2010 14:21:00

I’m telling you, Tom Cruise Jr really IS Tom Cruise Jr. In so many ways. This is Taylor Lautner leaving LAX today. Side by side, see for yourself. Right? And the security detail too. It’s the same! Tom Cruise and Tom Cruise Jr. They same body type, the same aviators, Jr’s even working the jaw clench now, and of course the same plastic machine Hollywood attitude. Full Story

Xenu fertility

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 1, 2010 10:13:58 March 1, 2010 10:13:58

For the rest of the world, most of the time, babies are conceived when two people get together and have sex. On occasion, when that isn’t successful, science is involved. These procedures however do not include purging aliens from our reproductive tracts. Unless of course you’re a member of the Church of Xenu. Full Story

JLo, Will …& Xenu

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 28, 2009 07:18:36 October 28, 2009 07:18:36

THIS IS IT premiered last night in LA – Jennifer Lopez and Will Smith were the top two names on the carpet, both with ties to the GMD and, yes, both with ties to the Xenu. It’s been a terrible week for the Xenu. Paul Haggis left him Full Story

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Robo Disconnected

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 26, 2009 14:53:24 October 26, 2009 14:53:24

That word explains everything. Per the Paul Haggis revelations mentioned in today’s open, “disconnect” is a Scientology policy that refers to the action taken against those who do not share the Xenu love. Haggis’s wife was ordered to “disconnect” from her family when they broke from the Church. Full Story

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Don’t be a stuck squirrel!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 21, 2009 08:20:23 October 21, 2009 08:20:23

Please. This is the party I would have really wanted to be at. Us Weekly is reporting that on October 16th, the GMD and Katie Holmes were in London attending a Scientology event with thousands of other Xenu lovers to celebrate the 25th anniversary of the International Association of Scientologists. Full Story