Overrated goes to Letterman

April 17, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at April 17, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jessica Biel yesterday in NYC, presumably to promote Next starring Nicolas Cage, which looks like every other movie he’s made in the last 5 years.

So does she look good? Well of course she looks good. Because that’s actually all she does. With a crazy shelf ass of course. But seriously, what ELSE can Jessica Biel do BUT go to the gym, go the beach, go walk the dog, go on Letterman with a great white dress and lovely red lipstick and Just.Look.Good???

What else?

As for her role in the movie, if the trailers are any indication, and the trailers are how they appear to be selling her, she plays The Lover. So she’s either half naked in bed with a sheet covering her breasts, or pouting, or crying, or telling Nic she loves him, or looking scared because she’s been kidnapped by the bad guys.

Rest assured however that in every scene, her hair looks great.

Also rest assured that in every scene, Julianne Moore blows her out of the universe.

Then again, Julianne Moore is a real actress. Whereas Jessica Biel is simply a girl with a great body who may or may not be dating Justin Timberlake. Period.

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