Douchebags Articles

Annoying and entitled Hollywood celebrity douchebags.

Is this what you’re staying for?

November 10, 2011 17:52:05 Posted at November 10, 2011 17:52:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You’ve heard about this mess at Penn State? Click here for the long well, researched version. Click here for the celebrity reading level edition specifically as it relates to Ashton Kutcher. In short, he tweeted support for a man who has been fired for his suspected involvement in the cover-up of alleged child abuse, then realised he f-cked up, then deleted his tweets, then apologised, then promised he won’t be tweeting anymore until he figures out how to manage his feed. Full Story

The Oscars go KABOOM no more

November 9, 2011 15:41:35 Posted at November 9, 2011 15:41:35
Sarah Posted by Sarah
David Livingston/Getty

It’s been a rough week for Brett Ratner. First Olivia Munn outs him as the pervy director who jacked off in front of her while holding a shrimp, then he admitted to banging Munn, but not the shrimp/jacking off part, then Tower Heist was a disappointment, then he went on Howard Stern and apologized for making Munn sound like a tart but proceeded to share off-color remarks about his sex life. Full Story

Are you tiring of Johnny Depp?

November 8, 2011 20:56:05 Posted at November 8, 2011 20:56:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Pascal Le Segretain/FRANCOIS GUILLOT/Getty

A lot of people seem pissy at Johnny lately for the sh-t he’s been talking about...well...everything. This week it’s an interview with The Guardian which isn’t actually a bad interview in that he’s honest with his answers and with his flaws, almost disturbingly so (laughing about Bruce Robinson, The Rum Diary director, falling off the wagon made me a little uncomfortable). Full Story

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Poor SJP

November 3, 2011 17:37:41 Posted at November 3, 2011 17:37:41
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sarah Jessica Parker went to the Melbourne Cup Carnival today and had to hang out with Elizabeth Hurley and that vile Shane Warne she’s engaged to. Some people are really good at not letting their inside thoughts show up on their faces. This not one of my skills. My friend Laura - the one with the Robert Pattinson problem - she’s even worse, or better, depending how you see it. Full Story

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No, no, he’s not a dick at all

November 1, 2011 23:30:35 Posted at November 1, 2011 23:30:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Hugh Grant is a father. Us Weekly broke the story that the 51 year old welcomed a baby girl in October. There is no official word on who the mother is but multiple outlets are speculating that she’s a Chinese actress called Tinglan Hong with whom Hugh was seen earlier this year. Full Story

Cheating bareback

October 12, 2011 14:33:34 Posted at October 12, 2011 14:33:34
Lainey Posted by Lainey

So here’s the new issue of Us Weekly featuring Ashton Kutcher and 22 year old Sara Leal who doesn’t look like she regrets the way she landed her first magazine cover. Sara goes into full detail about what went down that night in San Diego. More on that in a minute. Full Story

All natural Shelfy

October 11, 2011 18:53:41 Posted at October 11, 2011 18:53:41
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Flynet, Neill J. Schutzer/Splash

Jessica Biel arrived at LAX the other day in a toque and a bare face. I mean, if it isn’t a bare face, it’s as close as it gets. She’s beautiful. Maybe even a little smug right now. After all, Justin came to get her back. After all the cheating. And in the mind of a clinger, this qualifies as a win. We are about 2 weeks away from the release of Pippy’s new movie In Time with Amanda Seyfried, co-starring his rumoured one-time hook-up Olivia Wilde. Full Story

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Leo looks pissed

October 7, 2011 18:53:21 Posted at October 7, 2011 18:53:21
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Wenn, Bauer, Frank Micelotta/ROBYN BECK/Getty

Obviously not for the reason I’ve been jizzing about all week but since Blake’s baller-ness is my favourite thing in life right now, this totally works. Here’s the post for Clint Eastwood’s upcoming J Edgar starring Leonardo DiCaprio who just got his balls cut off by a TV Gossip Girl. OMG. I love her. Full Story

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“Hot-tub worthy” infidelity

October 5, 2011 14:40:41 Posted at October 5, 2011 14:40:41
Lainey Posted by Lainey

That was apparently the qualification for Ashton Kutcher when he cheated on his wife Demi Moore on their wedding anniversary in San Diego at the Hard Rock Hotel: the girls had to be “hot-tub worthy” and he took his time deliberating on the local offering before deciding on two “hot-tub worthy” candidates to take back to his suite, where they did indeed, all three of them, get into the hot-tub, naked, to make out. Full Story

You are not Lenny Kravitz

October 4, 2011 19:30:06 Posted at October 4, 2011 19:30:06
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Bauer, KCSPresse/Splash

Definitely have a double standard going here. Call me on it, please. Because if Lenny Kravitz were walking around Paris Fashion Week like this, I’d be totally ok with it. But ... Jared Leto isn’t Lenny Kravitz. Jared Leto walking around Paris Fashion Week like this just looks like a loser. Unfair? Would I be less unfair if I was more of a fan of his music? If I considered him a “rock star” would I be more tolerant of his try-full “rock star” stylings? Rock Star or Pop Star? I want there to be a difference. Full Story