Dumbass Articles

Celebrity bad decisions, mistakes, and Hollywood stupidity.

Dumb Words

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 24, 2011 09:55:56 January 24, 2011 09:55:56

My Porny, ONCE AGAIN, took to Twitter to express gratitude that Eric Johnson has agreed to live off her fortune. The other day, Jacek called me Toronto from Vancouver to get me to call our regular sushi place to order him takeout. It's because I talk to the staff in Chinese and he thinks they pack the rolls better as a result. Full Story

Paps on payroll

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 21, 2011 12:13:06 January 21, 2011 12:13:06

Why can’t this girl keep her sh-t tight? They all use the paps – though she does it most egregiously – but most of them are able to lock down the leaks. Lindsay Lohan can’t keep her f-ckery a secret. EVER. Maybe it’s time to admit she sucks at being a celebrity. Here’s the lastest… Remember the time she was late for curfew at Betty Ford and allegedly beat down the staffer who confronted her? The staffer originally wanted to nail Lilo’s ass for assault, then, for some reason, changed her entire story and refused to cooperate with authorities investigating the incident. Full Story

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From the book of Jesse James

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 21, 2011 09:34:00 January 21, 2011 09:34:00

Only the Brange can get away with this kind of PDA. And even if we disagree on everything, I think we can all agree that Kelsey Grammer is not Brad Pitt. But here he is the other day in New York, strolling down the street like it’s a photo shoot, with his brand new 29 year old fiancée Kayte White, like puppy love looks good on a 55 year old embroiled in a public bitter divorce battle. Full Story

Lilo + Oscar

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 20, 2011 08:54:55 January 20, 2011 08:54:55

She talks about this a lot. Once she said that one of her life goals was to win an Oscar before the age of 30. I still laugh about that one. This is a classic Lohan delusion. Daydreaming about something so out of reach, like it’s actually a possibility, for the sake of the achievement itself, without actually stopping to consider what it would take to make that a reality. Full Story

Douche in a Rolls

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 20, 2011 08:12:31 January 20, 2011 08:12:31

Well if this isn’t a douche alert… Check out Ryan Phillippe, in track pants and a nipple-hugging white t-shirt, after lunch yesterday in LA cruising around in a ROLLS ROYCE. Really??? A Rolls Royce? Like, who ARE you? And why is Amanda Seyfried so stupid? How do you get hard when a guy pulls up in a Rolls Royce steering it with his dick? Sit DOWN Ryan Phillippe. Full Story

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Best Cutaways: Lea Michele

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 17, 2011 09:31:28 January 17, 2011 09:31:28

Written by Duana Lea Michele is, in a manner of speaking, what I want for Christmas 2011. Soft spot? For the overdramatic emoting singer who’s 24 going on 17? Me? What do you mean? Okay, first things first. I do kind of love her. That is, I love that she’s unabashedly delighted with being on a hit show and red carpets and isn’t all “Oh but BROADWAY” and guys, she LOVES dressing up and she loves to win and she’s only the same age as Leighton, who’s certainly had some clothing biffs this year. Full Story

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Worst poster, worst title, worst trailer

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 13, 2011 13:25:50 January 13, 2011 13:25:50

In September I posted this about Kate Hudson’s new movie A Little Bit of Heaven. Dumbass title came with a dumbass poster. Look at Gael Garcia Bernal’s nose. Why is her mouth open? Who responds to this sh-t? WHY does she keep making the same movies over and over and over again? If you thought that the poster was misleading and that the movie would be different, you were wrong. Full Story

The graveyard shift

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 12, 2011 11:34:12 January 12, 2011 11:34:12

Written by Sarah January and February are traditionally where movies are sent to die. Reading the studios’ slates for January and February is like reading the obit section. “Atlas Entertainment is sad to announce that ‘Season of the Witch’ has died. Full Story

A man has needs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 6, 2011 12:03:25 January 6, 2011 12:03:25

This is the best thing that’s happened to me today. When I woke up, grumpy as f-ck, and bloated, reading about it made me happy. Picturing it, and then picturing the conversation after it, was even better. That might be a little perverted. As you know, T.I. is currently in prison for another year for being a dumbass and driving around tweaked and messing with his probation. Full Story

New Year toe, ring

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 4, 2011 14:03:03 January 4, 2011 14:03:03

Christina Aguilera has apparently been waving around a new ring. You know, I don’t get ring porn. Or bauble porn of any kind. I guess I’m dumb because of the value discrepancy but a good bag excites me so much more than a diamond. And, frankly, I find some people with their huuuuuuge diamonds a little tacky. Full Story

Worst of 2010: LeAnn Rimes & Eddie Cibrian

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 29, 2010 08:52:27 December 29, 2010 08:52:27

So they’re engaged now. After a year of constant arrogant bullsh-t, and a Shape Magazine cover controversy – click here for a refresher - and a previous engagement that they denied because they wanted to maximise their exposure, and now a year-ending “official” engagement when all the real stars are in hibernation, so as to leverage more fuel for what’s sure to be an upcoming reality show… Would these two please F-CK OFF??? Needless to say, LeAnn has been documenting every moment of this happy news on her Twitter Full Story

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