Dumbass Articles

Celebrity bad decisions, mistakes, and Hollywood stupidity.

Porny makes it pay

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 27, 2009 12:25:14 May 27, 2009 12:25:14

It’s the Papa Joe way! Profit from EVERYTHING. And why not? Sounds like Porny Simpson is going back to reality where she saw the most success. On the heels of the amazing photos of her singing at the Chilli Country Cook Off wearing the best pants ever, Us Weekly is reporting  Full Story

FNL > J&K+8

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 20:01:58 May 26, 2009 20:01:58

Ugh. Almost 10 million watched that f-ckery Jon & Kate can’t afford to support all their babies so they exploit them on tv show last night. 10 MILLION. This morning I was on The John Gormley Show (he’s adorable and I love him) and he got me on this rant about J&K and I was like, dude, I’m a gossip columnist. Full Story

He doesn’t ask for much

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 21, 2009 09:01:24 May 21, 2009 09:01:24

Just a set of fake cans. Long legs to wrap around his waist. And nothing in the way of conversation. Makes sense. After all, wouldn’t call Chris Pine the most cerebral of stars. And he’s in no danger of earning that reputation now, especially since, according to the new issue of Us Weekly, he’s dating Audrina Patridge. Full Story

Kevin Federline > Lindsay Lohan

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 11, 2009 13:02:56 May 11, 2009 13:02:56

Lilo and her mother keep insisting that she “works so hard”. At what? It’s a mystery. This is Lindsay with her homeschooled in other words no-schooled sister out shopping the other day. What else do they do? Movies? No movies. Lilo claims there’s a movie planned but so far, everyone else is making movies except for her. Full Story

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Fence sitting Brooke

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 11, 2009 12:10:00 May 11, 2009 12:10:00

Last week, after Kiefer Sutherland decided to smash his head up against another dude’s face causing injury – in defence of Brooke Shields – a statement was released on her behalf that effectively sold him out. At the time, she supposedly announced via her publicists that she’d no idea why Kiefer would have reacted that way and that Jack McCollough, the victim of the headbutt, did nothing wrong. Full Story

Style > Sight

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 11, 2009 10:09:31 May 11, 2009 10:09:31

It’s Vanessa Hudgens at the Diesel men’s fragrance launch the other night in LA. Still have no idea what we’re supposed to do with her. Now also have no idea how she sees. Am old. Don’t understand the kids these days. Have a look at Vanessa’s thick fringe covering her eyes. Full Story

View from my room

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 8, 2009 16:07:00 May 8, 2009 16:07:00

Not that anyone comes to Vegas for the room view, but mine is particularly horrendous. This is who I woke up to. Have a great weekend!    Full Story

Pillpopper backtrack

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 8, 2009 11:35:32 May 8, 2009 11:35:32

Earlier this week, Paula Abdul made headlines for an interview with Ladies Home Journal during which she allegedly admitted, finally, to being addicted to prescription pills for chronic back pain and had to detox in rehab – revealing she could have killed herself the withdrawal sucked so hard. Needless to say, it came as no surprise. Full Story

Her kind of man

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 7, 2009 16:15:46 May 7, 2009 16:15:46

Megan Fox covers the new issue of Elle and reveals that she’s not interested in guys in their 20s because she’s too articulate for them: “Robert Pattinson and Zac – they’re just too pretty with the big hair and the suits. And Rob is, what, 22? Zac is 21? That’s a joke. Full Story

Does he need money?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 7, 2009 10:45:00 May 7, 2009 10:45:00

Like most bitches, I love being right. But I want to be wrong so badly this time. Next year I hope to wrong. I hope to eat every word written below. I truly, truly wish for this. Oh James McAvoy. Laura and I were discussing it this morning. Per Variety Full Story

Those legs again

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 27, 2009 11:42:30 April 27, 2009 11:42:30

Zac Efron in Germany to promote his box office topping 17 Again. LipGloss brought his signature hair mop and also those legs – those mangly blendered legs cocked in several angles and directions at once… is this the stance of the Modern Man? Since when did boys start imitating Ebola Hilton’s red carpet pose? This is disgusting to me. Full Story