Needing Supervision … and a Beard

May 29, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at May 29, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Remember him? From a riddle I posted on May 1st? About a closeted star getting a little too bold about his boyfriends, long before so many other blind items from other gossip outlets? Well it appears the gay is out of the bag. And it only took this long because for many, many years he kept his true homo hidden and disguised under marriage from a now deceased relative who would not have accepted it. Now that the loved one is no longer with us, he"s free to be single and on the prowl. The problem is his management doesn"t want him prowling publicly. They were already alarmed before and now that so many columns have been alluding to his sequins and feathers, they are desperate to find him his very own Katie, an engineered romance to take the heat off the gay talk. But - shocker of shockers! - he is actually thinking about living in the light, much to the consternation of his handlers who predict a huge drop in earning potential should he expose his hidden sequins. And that"s the part that I find absurd. Because trust me, he"s hardly a heartthrob. In fact, past roles would indicate quite the opposite. Still… the agents are the experts and for some reason, they think he"d do better as a Straight. Which explains the backstage battle. And the best part is - we get to find out who wins soon enough. Because I hear he"ll either come out flaming by the end of the year or have a high profile non-gay romance just in time to begin marketing for his next major release - a family (read conservative) comedy that is expected to make a killing at the box office. And can I just mention - once again - that I had this on May 1st??? Sorry…just wanted to drive the point home for the benefit of the disbelievers out there. It"s a called a date stamp, y"all. And it"s not Hugh Jackman. Or John Travolta.
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