Ezra Miller will play a broody, emo ARTISTE who runs really fast
Warner Brothers is in the middle of their annual shareholder presentation right now, and CEO Kevin Tsujihara just dropped some major info bombs regarding the future of their DC movies slate, confirming a Wonder Woman solo movie in 2017, along with the proper Justice League team-up flick that Superhero Face Punch is setting up (which will also be directed by Zack Snyder), and an Aquaman movie in 2019 (HAHAHA), along with The Rock’s Shazam/Black Adam project.
But the real eye-catcher is that The Flash—a guy who runs really fast, like Quicksilver—is coming to the big screen, and he’ll be played by Ezra Miller. Don’t recognize the name right away? He’s Lainey’s TEXTILES guy. We Need To Talk About Kevin is now playing a superhero whose power set is that he runs real good. Miller is a very good actor, and historically, the odder the choice the better it works out, but Jesus. WB really wasn’t kidding about “no jokes” were they? We’re in for a moody, broody, pouty Flash. Yay?
The Flash movie is slated for 2018, so it’ll be a few years before we get a real sense of what it will mean for Miller to be a superhero. In the meantime, this clears up Scoot McNairy’s role in Superhero Face Punch. After he was photographed in costume wearing green socks for VFX, people wondered if he was playing The Flash, but no, it would seem he really is playing Clark Kent’s pal Jimmy Olsen. A legless Jimmy Olsen, who, rumor has it, lost his legs during Superman’s battle with Zod in Man of Steel. But he totally doesn’t blame Superman! It’s just that no corner of the DC cinematic universe can contain any measure of joy. Everything must be dour and each second must bear the weight of human catastrophe. Much grit. So grimdark.
WB’s plans are ambitious, but before any of it can happen, they need Superhero Face Punch to make a metric ton of money. Remember, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 made over $700 million and it wasn’t enough and now Sony’s once-ambitious Spider-Man slate has been decimated as a result. The way WB is scheduling, they’re going to have to go into production on a number of movies before they really know how they’re faring (David Ayers will direct a Suicide Squad movie for 2016, and Snyder will be at work on Justice League: Lunchtime of Justice). That’s risky, especially considering that Tsujihara also outlined a $200 million annual spending reduction at the studio. A lot of that will come in the form of layoffs, but it also means their margin of error has gotten a lot slimmer.
I hope they make it, though, I really do. I want to see this Ezra Miller Flash movie, and I have high hopes for a Wonder Woman movie in which all she does is respond to online harassment, and maybe an Aquaman movie in which Aquaman slowly chokes to death on a plastic Coke can ring before a horny dolphin assaults him.